The Game of Life
by skyflyte12
Summary: AU femnaru. Our favourite bull-headed ninja is a female; but what was that about intelligent? Crafty? Pink, sparkly jounins? In the words of Naruto Uzumaki: "Keep smiling. It makes people wonder what you're up to." abandoned for now
1. A Female Hero

A/N: Well folks, this is my first ever Naruto fanfic! I actually wasn't going to post this, but I decided that I may as well. Here's hoping that you don't find it complete and utter trash. Disclaimer: I am not the dude who thought up Naruto.

If you don't like the AU's where Naruto is a female, then don't read this fanfic. (duh!)

* * *

**Chapter 1: A Female Hero**

The first thing that was quite readily apparent in Konohagakure no Sato - the Village Hidden in the Leaves - on this particular morning was the large monument bearing the faces of the four revered Hokage.

Now, _usually_ this is a large and comforting presence; always there but in the background - the residents so accustomed to the ever-present faces that little attention is wasted on them.

Funny how all this changed in a single morning, because of the actions of a single person.

Citizens of Konoha stood in shock; momentarily frozen in place.

You see, the faces were covered in graffiti – the Shodaime was painted to be looking disapprovingly at his brother, the Nidaime, who appeared to be sleeping on the job. The Sandaime had a substance that looked suspiciously like blood dripping from his nose, coupled with a lecherous expression – he was staring at the picture of a mostly naked girl that seemed to have been scribbled upon the sleeping Nidaime's left cheek. The Yondaime was painted to look more life-like; trademark blonde hair and bright blue eyes taking in the scene with apparent good humour (more like laughing his arse off at the actions of his predecessors).

All shinobi of the village were staring slack-jawed and found themselves completely off-balance.

The question in everyone's mind was who would possibly do this. _Surely_ there was no one who would actually even _think_ of doing this to their beloved heroes and leaders, much less be able to _get away_ with painting the faces when there were _at least_ one-third of the village in full view of the monument at all times.

It was impossible! Yet, it seemed that it _had_ happened.

* * *

"Hokage-sama!"

The aged Hokage looked up from his paperwork apprehensively. That tone usually meant that _a lot_ of extra paperwork and trouble was impending. He calmly extracted his pipe from his mouth, inwardly sighing and inquired, "What is it, Izumo?"

The Chuunin was obviously distressed; his expression would have caused Sarutobi to laugh had the situation been different.

The situation _was_ different, however, because upon looking towards the chuunin and away from the torture disguised as 'paperwork', the Kage had a full view of the vandalised faces. He stared slack-jawed, then blinked. Upon seeing it didn't go away, he rubbed his eyes, only to open them and find that the Kage monument actually _had_ been painted to look ridiculous.

Now, Sarutobi Hiruzen was an old man and had learnt to find humour in most situations. As it was, he found this hilarious; but under the sharp gaze of a chuunin he often thought _should_ learn to be more mature, he managed to stifle this instinct, hiding it with years worth of practised iron-clad self control.

Carefully, he asked, "Who did it?"

Izumo stood there, resisting the urge to roll his eyes, "There is no evidence, but really, we all know that only one person will get accused."

Sarutobi pursed his lips, agreeing with the chuunin. Then he sighed, "Did anyone see her leaving the scene? How can this be a village with ANBU patrols and no one see a person paint the largest thing that is easily viewable by the whole city?"

Izumo stood nervously, "Well, that's the question, isn't it? No one has seen her anywhere near the monument, so she should be fine… but they haven't seen anyone else, either."

Sarutobi sighed. There was only one thing he could do; the council had been at his throat for ages trying to impress upon him that he needed to capture the mysterious prankster of the village – there was a set routine for what had to happen now – the accused was to be interrogated, in an attempt to uphold 'justice' and find the one responsible for the 'crime.' Unfortunately, there was one person that was always accused immediately, so it was his duty to tell the chuunin to collect the suspected 'mastermind' behind the plot.

_She_ would not be harmed, however. The Sandaime actually hoped sometimes that it _was_ her pulling the pranks just for the heck of it – she would get blamed anyway, why not have the fun yourself?

Fortunately (or unfortunately), no one in the village had any inkling as to who may be responsible for them – although they still liked to point to the scapegoat and the one he sees as a granddaughter to be at the heart of the mess. Just like the council.

To be honest with himself, even Sarutobi didn't know who was pulling the pranks; after all the interrogations (no torture, of course) she still had not said anything incriminating – they probably had the wrong person. It had become routine. A bizarre routine, but routine none-the-less.

After all, it would take a highly skilled stealth expert to pull off most of the pranks; and the very best to paint something as large and obvious as the Hokage Mountain in front of a village populated by constantly alert shinobi and citizens.

Sarutobi shook himself from his musings and noticed Izumo (im)patiently waiting for his orders. "Fine, go collect Naruto from the academy and bring her to Ibiki."

Izumo grinned a little, delighted at the reprieve he was getting from gate duty – not to mention that the chuunin who got to collect Naruto also got to watch Ibiki try to persuade or trick the answer from the girl.

That was always amusing – after all, seeing the Head of Torture and Interrogation joking around with a young girl is something you don't get to see just anywhere you know.

They (the council) had even resorted to calling an Inuzuka into the short sessions in a last-ditch attempt to read her dishonesty – even Ibiki, HEAD of the ANBU Torture and Interrogation department, master of using the mind of victims against themselves, was unable to conclude that Naruto was, in fact, responsible for the pranks – quite the opposite, actually.

He had concluded in the official report that they (the council) were being stupid in thinking a mere _academy student_ had the skills to perform the pranks, and that she was innocent of them.

Even so, Ibiki didn't mind a little time with the girl who was not fazed by the scars across his face… oh, and the reason that _every_ time a large prank was pulled on the village she was hauled off to the imposing ANBU building. He found her mind fascinating, though no one was game enough to actually go in and check it out – no one wanted to risk stumbling across the fox. Of course, all the higher level shinobi – chuunin upwards – had met Naruto at one time or another, and she had created a reputation for herself due to the strength of her mind and that unwavering tenacity in her beliefs (both practically a prerequisite of being a ninja).

Of course, there were still those who refused to see past their grief, but there were enough sympathisers that she had gained very good ANBU protectors (not that she knew it) who saw to it that none of the more hateful villagers got near her.

Izumo did a mock salute, straightening with a quick, "Hai, Hokage-sama!" And then took off to complete his 'mission'.

Although, he could have _sworn_ he heard laughter the moment he left the Sandaime's office…

* * *

Umino Iruka was a kind man.

A kind man, who was delt a hard lot in life.

He had a dazed look on his face as he observed the cacophony that was 'his' classroom, and did a mental checklist. _Sakura and Ino screeching at each other, Sasuke narrowly avoiding being man-handled by some fangirls, Shikamaru sleeping while Kiba draws on his face, Chouji not noticing Kiba drawing on Shikamaru's face because he is too intent on his chips, Shino seems to be sulking in a corner playing with his bugs (although it's not certain), Hinata seems to have retreated to the wall to avoid the flying objects... oh look, there goes a desk… AHH A DESK! NOT GOOD!_

It was only in this state of disrepair as Mizuki – his former best friend and teacher's aid – had turned traitor to the village and was neutralised by the ANBU that had discovered his plot to steal the Forbidden Scroll from the Hokage's library, effectively leaving him bereft of help... Which brought him back to the rather desperate situation at hand.

He was preparing to employ his infamous 'Big-Head no Jutsu' to get the gaki (oops, future genin of the village – Kami help us) to be quiet, only to be put off-balance when the door to his classroom slid open to reveal a fellow chuunin – Kamizuki Izumo, who seemed to be amused at what he saw as all the gaki (correction, future genin, Iruka reminded himself rather desperately) froze in their places – quite a humorous sight considering Chouji's hand was half way to his mouth, Ino was in the motions of attempting to pull Sakura's hair out… and he didn't even _want_ to try to explain the rather _questionable_ positions that the fangirls attacking Sasuke (sorry, 'declaring their love') had gotten themselves into.

He would only note idly that Sasuke seemed to have taken to sitting on the window sill, attempting to look 'cool' and 'unruffled' even though there was a large rip in the seat of his pants revealing rather embarrassing underwear. The only noise left over was the obnoxious sound of a chair clattering to the floor.

Izumo's eyes swept over the frozen kids (gaki) before they redirected to Iruka, who had the air of a man close to a mental breakdown.

He took pity on Iruka and employed a fraction of killing intent, which caused the brats to scramble to their desks, collecting the misplaced objects scattered throughout the room and replacing them to their original positions, all rather worse for wear. Izumo coughed and turned back to Iruka once again, almost laughing at the mixture of envy and sincere gratitude on the poor chuunin's face.

Izumo was thinking that it was a shame Iruka wasn't able to use killing intent; he was too kind-hearted for that – which was admittedly the reason he had the misfortune to be 'assigned' as an academy instructor. After all, they didn't want to frighten the gaki before they even got to genin level; thus the need to keep away the all-too-often sadistic higher-levelled shinobi… no, those would be saved for the genin teams (cue to cackle evilly in his head).

"Umino Iruka?" He questioned formally… after all, the gaki needed to be under the impression that being a shinobi was a serious job (which, admittedly, it was, no matter what the nut-cases in the higher ranks seemed to give the illusion of).

"Hai. What do you need, Izumo?" Iruka questioned, although he had a pretty good idea.

"Iruka-san, the Hokage requests I collect Uzumaki Naruto for a meeting she must attend."

Iruka nodded amiably. He knew exactly what that 'meeting' entailed; after all, he had been one of the many chuunin to accompany her on occasion – those 'talks' had been taking place for several years, even before he became a sensei to the gaki. "Hai. Uzumaki Naruto, would you please go with Izumo-san?"

When there was no movement from the class, he took another look, eyes scanning for the girl. It was then that it hit him – he _hadn't_ seen her taking part in the madness that had been present seconds before… though if he thought back, he could have sworn he saw her there when he marked the role. In his confusion, he glanced at the role, and upon seeing the tick next to Naruto's name, went back to scanning the classroom.

After a few moments of looking, he demanded, "Have any of you seen Naruto in the past few minutes?"

To his relief, Haruno Sakura raised her hand and nodded. Iruka motioned for her to talk, and she did so in that voice she always used to answer questions – the superior voice that practically proclaimed she thought she was the best kunoichi in the class, "Hai, Iruka sensei. Ano…"

And she pointed reluctantly behind him. Iruka instinctively turned (not all the way around, mind you. He had learnt his lesson a while ago to NEVER turn your back on the gaki, a lesson he had passed down faithfully to all the new instructors for the last few years) and upon seeing the girl a little tick appeared on his forehead.

"NARUTO!" He yelled, irritated.

For where was the girl but _sleeping_ in _his_ chair; face on her hands, eyes closed and everything. She twitched into consciousness, lazily opening her eyes. Her face was blank for a moment as she looked at all the eyes that were on her, then a grin spread across her face, "Yo, Iruka-sensei." She said happily.

Iruka caught the sound of the class stifling snickers, (what put him off the most was the unmistakable sound of Izumo restraining his own, as well) and rolled his eyes. "Naruto, it's nice to see you awake." He said sardonically, "Now, usually I would ask you why you are sleeping in _my_ class and in _my_ chair and so on, but Izumo-san needs you to go to a meeting with him."

Naruto grinned at this information and nodded to Izumo, whose stern expression flickered momentarily to a grin. She stretched her arms and skipped out of the chair, practically bouncing over to Izumo, getting over her momentary disorientation of being asleep.

Izumo schooled his expression, repressing the smile for the sake of the brats looking on with open curiosity, and motioned for her to leave the room ahead of him.

He noted absently that she was dressed in comfortable and appropriate clothes for future missions (something that many of the younger kunoichi tended to disregard in favour of dressing to catch the eye of one of the boys in class) and was wearing loose dark blue pants that were taped off just below her knees with bandages, coupled with a loose orange t-shirt over a mesh shirt with sleeves that went to just above her elbows. There was an open dark blue vest over the orange shirt. Blue shinobi sandals were silent on the hard floor, giving her the look of a serious kunoichi, not a mere academy student; even with the orange that she seemed to treasure.

Admittedly, the class _were_ to be given the 'genin exam' the next day, but it seemed that most of the prospective kunoichi (fine, _all_ excluding that Hinata girl) were taking this as some kind of joke. No matter. They would find out that it wasn't all fun and games very soon.

Abandoning this morbid line of thought, Izumo focused on keeping up with the hyperactive blonde who was running just ahead of him towards the ANBU headquarters. Now, didn't that sentence sound weird? Shaking his head, he repressed a frown. It just wasn't right that an eleven-year-old should know the direct route to the Head Interrogator's office. Well, she would be turning twelve in a few months, but the same sentiment applied.

She was waiting by the ANBU guards when Izumo finally caught up to her, chatting animatedly with them. They, of course, did not say anything, but Izumo could have sworn they were attentive to the little girl. They nodded and waved the two in, and Naruto smiled before shouting a last "ja, hawk-san, lion-san."

Izumo was caught off-guard when they replied, "Ja ne, Naruto."

'Well,' Izumo thought to himself amusedly, 'you encounter something new everyday hanging around Naruto.'

* * *

A/N: Ok ok, I know from experience that lots of people don't like femnaru fics, ect ect, but you know what? I don't give a damn.

I am doing an AU here peoples, and mostly writing what I myself would enjoy to read. There are going to be a lot of changes that I think would have happened had Naruto been a girl, so there WILL be characters that act differently from what they did in the canon version.

I'll even explain my reasons for some things, before you ask the more obvious questions.

1. A big thing that is probably bothering you guys (that you encountered first) was the whole Naruto being blamed for pranks but not being proved to have done them.

Now, I am operating under a few different assumptions here. (Changes because Naruto is female). Firstly is the fact that if you see the canon, the males are _extremely _sexist. This has worked for Naruto in the fact that more people were actually willing to see the little girl – they do not accept females in general as threats unless they are mad, and a little girl is the least thing they would be afraid of; not to mention they assume Kyuubi was male, so her being 'different' in their minds (even sub-consciously) is a point in her favour.

Another thing is that have you noticed that females are more likely to find ways of doing things from a sideways direction, instead of headfirst; they don't immediately resort to using fists as is the male approach to a lot of things in their early years. So, this Naruto resorted to trying to find a way to do things for herself; using her brain to do it – canon Naruto took the bull approach and tried to combat everyone at once, which was too much as the group mentality would take over, so ones that may have sympathised reacted the same as the group to avoid being ostracised from society.

I bet canon Naruto had a brain – especially because he can read and write when no one would have taught him – but (in my opinion) he repressed his intelligence because it was hurting him – it is easier to actually _be_ oblivious to the reactions of people than suffer through it… and he got so used to forcing himself not to understand that he buried his own intelligence and awareness to social situations (thus his obliviousness to Hinata) permanently.

ANYWAYS, this female Naruto has a brain and somehow learned to read (like the canon Naruto did; I think it was a side-effect of Kyuubi) and found a way to sneak into the biggest book place she could; the library - (or found a sympathiser that would let her in). Anyway, she used this from a very young age, and in this way you can imagine she learnt a lot; which she then took to the practise field – because, honestly, she had nothing else to do due to the lack of parents ect, and it _is_ a hidden village so the most prevalent job is being a ninja, so naturally, so would do this.

Now, canon Naruto's (really major) problems were chakra control, a lack of information and no social interaction. This Naruto, being female, had naturally better chakra control but also started the tree climbing and water walking exercises from a much younger age – when she had _less_ chakra, meaning it would be _easier_ to control it, and since she gained control _before_ it got too big, she is able to have great control – after all, jounins are able to control their large capacities because they learnt control before it got large.

Because of the looks she got from society, she was always seeking a way to get away from them, which brought her to the library, where she learnt a lot. She learnt stuff like how to cook for herself, and used henge to shop properly. So, she was able to care for herself, but she was still hated. So she, in true Naruto fashion, decided to adopt the saying 'don't get revenge, get even' and pulled pranks on the worst of the whisperers. She just did it with much better plans and a (basic) grasp of genjutsu. They got progressively larger, which allowed her to test her stealth abilities, and she managed to stay undetected, _even _from the ANBU guard (because they seriously didn't suspect a little girl of being able to think of some of the pranks, much less execute them. Remember, a major weakness of ninja's is the tendency to underestimate the opponents, unless they are given evidence that contradicts with this view).

The first time she pulled a prank on one of the council, the member demanded that Sandaime find the perpetrator. Now, she was only about 5, but the council member was adamant she had done it somehow. So, she was taken to talk with Ibiki (the only interrogator Sarutobi trusted not to hurt her), and garnered herself a friend – after all, Naruto has always had the personality that gets into the hearts of people. She started to play bigger pranks to talk to her 'Ibiki-nii', which meant different chuunin were forced to attend with her (a sneaky idea of Sandaime's) and she garnered herself some friends/sympathisers. So, she had more people to talk with, although most of the citizens she interacts with are still out of the loop and haven't had contact with her, so they still hate her.

Well, that's why she sees Ibiki, and why she wasn't been caught – after all, canon Naruto was still able to finish his pranks before getting caught, so this Naruto was able to finish the plans and get away.

2. Now, I just want to say something about the village's reactions. I know a lot of AU's have Naruto being physically abused (in very grisly ways if she is a girl) as I'm sure you noticed. Well, on this one I am with the canon on this subject – they DO NOT touch her, as they are afraid of her (despite this they give her scornful looks and hate her, just like canon) They may throw the odd thing at her, but that never gets her.

Now, this is a very bad thing because even though she has friends (although most are much older than her) she has never really had human contact in the form of affection… or she hasn't had much. Now this is due to a few reasons, one partly being that I have rectified a **huge** stupid thing in the canon version that I find totally illogical – that Naruto doesn't have any kick-arse power to use. I mean, come on! Naruto is the Jinchuuriki of the freaking Kyuubi! Shouldn't that mean he gets the best power? (Or at least a cool one). Even if his seal is better, it still doesn't explain that he doesn't get anything to stop attacks, only to heal them. But whatever. So yeah, you will find that out later (it is not very original, but I like the idea).

Did you know babies actually **need** physical contact and affection to survive, beyond what is necessary? Well, yeah the absence of the childhood affection is bad, and adds to her suffering (and was bad for canon Naruto).

3. Now for her character/personality. I will remind you that this is an AU, so she will be different to canon Naruto. She is still pretty hyperactive, (something unavoidable with all that chakra) but she is also very quick with a brilliant mind (something I actually think the real Naruto has; the repression I bet he was doing of his intelligence probably stops when he needs it to survive – the basic human survival instincts are to protect themselves with all they can – thus the brilliant on-the-fly plans – it is actually just the self-imposed mental block disappearing for those moments.)

Now, this Naruto was not put in the academy early, so she didn't fail 3 times before passing, this is her first time.

Oh, Naruto is also more mature than your average kid, because she grew up so fast because of her experiences; as I said about the canon Naruto suppressing, she is different as she didn't just ignore it, so I think that she has a right to be more mature, after everything she has experienced.

5. The Mizuki thing – I find it impossible that the ANBU _didn't_ know what he was going to do – I think there were probably ANBU tailing the canon Naruto that just turned a blind eye, or didn't care enough to look. A big difference in this fic is the pranks and general attitude towards them – they have no idea who is doing it, so naturally after living through a few years of this, they are more alert, meaning they will pick out threats easier. Also that Naruto has had direct contact with the ANBU, and that she is a 'weak' girl (no one has noticed the before-mentioned ability of Naruto's, because they are still pretty oblivious towards her and the ones that may have noticed haven't done anything to activate it in their vicinity) so they try harder to protect her, and I mean, come on! Mizuki wasn't exactly ever quiet about the whole 'I hate Konoha' thing, and any properly trained ninja could have picked out his unusual behaviour.

6. Moving on. One thing I want to impress upon you is that there aren't a lot of friends that Naruto has, and almost none of them are seen with her out in public, so she is basically alone, just with a few people who do talk to her when they encounter each other.

7. Now, Naruto's scores at the academy: firstly, she refused to go to the specialised kunoichi classes (like flower arranging and so on) and no one was able to convince her to go – so they just left her alone to attend the shinobi classes.

Her taijutsu sucks, not because she doesn't have physical strength, but because of the whole academy teachers not willing to teach a 'demon' self defense thing, so she didn't have anyone correcting her stances. Due to the reading, she is very good at ninjutsu and is able to perform the higher-ranked genjutsu (because she would overload the lower ones), and she actually snuck into a few of the shinobi libraries to get techniques and stuff to practise, so she has a variety of those (including a very forbidden favourite technique of canon-Naruto's in his early genin days). But she is playing it out average, because she thinks/knows that the civilian population would not like her being good.

Plus, no one has asked or realised that she is better than she appears – would you go tell people you are stronger than you appear when you are a shinobi; when the element of surprise is practically a prerequisite?

8. Just to clarify, Naruto has the same dreams and the same determination; just because she isn't naïve like the canon Naruto doesn't mean she doesn't have the same goals. Oh, and she loves Ramen.

9. For everything else, you'll just have to wait and see XD.

Well, this is the end to what has to be the longest A/N ever written so I'd like to say Ja ne. (and no, I didn't just write this fanfic so I could complain about how Naruto is short changed and talk about my theories.

P.S: If you find a huge mistake, just tell me and I'll fix it up.


	2. Nani? Sadistic Jounins?

Disclaimer: Not mine... who'd a thunk it?

**Chapter 2: Nani? Sadistic Jounins?**

"Yo, Ibiki-nii!" The jovial voice called as its owner excitedly burst through the door to the office.

The usually sober-faced Tokubetsu Jounin looked up from his paperwork (shudder, the menace is more wide-spread than originally presumed) and allowed his lips to twitch involuntarily as he saw the blonde-haired, blue-eyed girl _bounce _(for there was no way that could be described as walking) into his office. "Konichiwa, Naru-chan."

The girl in question pouted cutely and whined, "Mou, Ibiki, I said not to call me that…"

He smirked, entertained at this reaction and said, "Well, Naru-chan, I said not to end up in here again! How do you manage to get yourself into so much trouble?"

Naruto inwardly rolled her eyes, and, offering a pout to the interrogator innocently replied, "Nani? I haven't done anything! I was told I had a meeting… Ibiki-nii, you know I wouldn't do anything to get into trouble!"

Ibiki couldn't help the small grin that pulled at his lips as he looked bemusedly down at the eleven-year-old that regarded _him_, the infamous and deathly-feared Head of the ANBU Interrogation unit, as a brother figure. He rolled his eyes, "But of course. What else would you do with your free time?"

They both knew it was a rhetorical question.

Naruto grinned mischievously, opening her mouth, "Well… "

Apparently, Naruto decided to treat it as otherwise.

Ibiki cut her off, "Rhetorical question, Naruto. Don't wanna know."

Naruto rubbed the back of her head sheepishly, ruffling up the already messy shoulder-length spiky blonde locks complete with a single longer strand of beads that dangled below her hairline that were, curiously enough, the unusual colour of orange.

Ibiki resisted the urge to sigh as he glanced reluctantly back at his paperwork, "Well, Naruto-imoto, I think we can safely say that you are not responsible for the newest edition of the infamous prankster's latest tricks. Unfortunately, I have paperwork to do, and I _know_ you have to get back to the academy –" He put on a stern face at Naruto's pout when he said that "– and yes, you do have to go back. It was good to see you again Naruto."

Naruto happily grinned up at him, "Ja, Ibiki-nii! I'll see you next time someone blames me for something else!"

It was the casual and happy way that this all-too-true and frankly morbid sentiment was expressed that gave Ibiki an unpleasant twisting feeling in his gut; one that he had thought he'd lost a long time ago.

Luckily, he was able to remain neutral as he nodded to her in return before she whipped around and _skipped_ (yet again, there is no way that could be classified as walking) out of the Head of Interrogation's office. Yet, the previous statement still threatened to put a sour look on his face to match the churning inside. He was able to restrain that particular urge successfully. After all, you become as good a shinobi as Ibiki and you can bluff your way through just about anything. You see enough bad things in this world, that it eventually dulls you to all others.

Unfortunately, it seemed Izumo hadn't had that much practise, and stared after her with the very same sour look Ibiki was suppressing. "If only…" He murmured before saluting respectfully at Ibiki and dashing out of the office, after the blond bundle of contradictions.

Once Ibiki was alone, he stared at the doorway for a moment more, fingering his bandana. 'Yes. If Only.' He thought to himself speculatively as he sighed once again and reluctantly returned to his 'paperwork'.

* * *

Naruto cheerfully left the office, congratulating herself on getting away with _yet another_ prank.

It had become a (one-sided) game between her and Ibiki-nii – well, admittedly not only Ibiki-nii, but the whole of ANBU.

Naruto may as well have declared war on the ANBU; it would have had much the same effect.

She was cackling to herself on the inside as she went back over her nefarious plot… ok, so maybe pranks couldn't count as _evil_ per say, but it sure was fun getting even with the villagers. Even if they didn't know it was her – actually, that was all the better! She could do what she wanted and _never_ get in trouble for it!

_Even if_ the ANBU had done nothing wrong; they were trying to stop the pranks.

...And it was fun, damn it. She was eleven! She was entitled to _fun_.

Not to mention that there was the added benefit of getting to play with Ibiki-nii. He wasn't even _trying_ to trick her into admitting that time! A _civilian_ could have seen through that! Oh well, Naruto thought to herself, at least she got out of class; even if only for a while.

Her plot had been perfect. Kage Bushin – a jutsu she had found on a scroll in the Sandaime's library (not that anyone knew she had been there) had got to be the awesome-est jutsu ever! It meant that she could have a solid alibi for all her pranks, _and_ not have to worry about getting caught! Not to mention that it made training a heck of a lot easier. And the ANBU had _no idea_ when they were tagging along after a clone! All it took was a hidden hand seal coupled with a kawarimi no jutsu and she was free!

… Oh, and they could do all the housework! Ok, more like apartment-work, but still, what else is a jounin level jutsu good for? Well, she knew one thing – the big old scroll she got it from was expressly labelled 'forbidden' – it wasn't a jutsu she could use in public… atleast until she got someone to 'teach' it to her – then it was free game!

But really, how did they think they would keep it safe by announcing that it was 'forbidden'? She would bet that if they put a label on it like 'un-finished paperwork,' it would actually _stay_ unopened! And the others called _her_ a dobe! It was all too funny.

Ah well, it seemed that was the end of her celebrating yet another victory for the 'demon' of the village. Izumo was being no fun and had caught up to her to motion her to follow him back to the academy – which she did, albeit reluctantly. She couldn't help but wonder, however, what had put the frown on his face. She didn't like it.

"Ne, Izumo. What's wrong?" Naruto asked the chuunin concernedly.

He blinked in surprise, pulled from his thoughts as he looked at her. She could tell his smile was slightly forced as he said, "Nani? Oh, Naruto. Don't worry, it's nothing. Gomen."

Naruto frowned for a moment, but then decided that if it was her fault, he would have said something. No one ever bothered to stay silent where she was concerned – even if she _didn't_ do it!

But that was ok, because at least _she_ had an accurate idea of what people thought about her. It was sometimes funny to hear the things she had found out about the villagers… you see, when she was really little, she had wondered what it was like being normal, so she had tried out her stealth skills by observing a lot of different people.

And as Naruto could tell you, a lot of the women acted way different to how they spoke or _really_ thought – it was all so confusing! She would see them being friends one moment, and then her good hearing would pick up them talking about the other scornfully behind her back. There was no way you would ever catch _her_ doing that! It would be way too confusing! How do they even keep track of what they really think?

Naruto shook her head, forcibly abandoning that particular subject. Actually, her observance of all those people had ironically been what gave her such a good understanding of all the signs of lying – subtle and non-subtle. Plus, it was really weird, but she could have sworn she could almost _sniff_ _out_ an untruth! She had done research, and concluded that it was infact, impossible, so decided to abandon _that_ wacky idea once and for all. She was just good at telling if someone was lying, and it came in damn handy.

She forced herself to focus on the outside world as she dutifully followed Izumo into Iruka's Domain™.

Iruka was talking (lecturing) them on something, and most of her classmates were zoned out – too far gone to be brought back from the reflexive sleep mechanism that saved them from the mind-numbing boredom.

The ones who were able to stay awake glanced at her and Izumo when Iruka's eyes flicked to the chuunin and academy student. He smiled slightly, gesturing her to return to her seat and dismissing Izumo.

Naruto reluctantly ascended to her seat next to one of her best friends, Hinata, who in Naruto's opinion _must_ have some kind of special power gifted to her by at _least_ a minor deity to actually be things like _awake_ and _alert_ while in the midst of one of Iruka-sensei's lectures.

Incidentally, even the 'forehead,' Haruno Sakura was teetering on the brink of mindless boredom.

Hinata grinned at her for a moment, then looked back to Iruka-sensei, either not noticing or completely ignoring Naruto. Naruto was watching her in awe, still bewildered of her ability to be listening _without any signs of boredom!_

Well, unlike Hinata, Naruto had a snowball's chance in hell of being awake for even another minute.

Already, she felt the pull of her eyelids… consciousness fading… going t.o s.l..e..e…p…

"NARUTOOOOO!!"

The loud shout jolted the poor girl into consciousness, and she gazed dazedly around, taking in the scene. She 'hmmed' under her breath as she saw that almost all the class was awake… and looking at her… and that Iruka-sensei was in his scary 'big-head no jutsu' form, obviously preparing to shout at her… and was that steam coming out of his ears?

Iruka-sensei glared at her, and viciously threw an eraser at her head, which she felt as it flew past, narrowly missing its target – although she had not moved. She was still blinking and disoriented.

Iruka was looking exasperated – for some reason, no matter _all_ the ninja experience he had, he just couldn't seem to hit her – which was strange, as she doesn't even move. He scowled at her disapprovingly and aimed at target #2, Nara Shikamaru, who was _still_ sleeping at his desk.

That result was much more satisfying, as he heard the dull _thunk_ as the make-shift 'weapon' bounced off the Nara's head, and he raised it lazily to give Iruka a half-arsed glare – probably thought it was too _troublesome_ to put more effort into it.

Iruka was careful to glare at the class (focusing on Naruto and Shikamaru) when he bit out, "Well, that was the revision for the test. I wish you all good luck tomorrow, and you better not be late. Class, Dismissed."

All the kids were gone in a few moments.

* * *

Naruto was currently grinning sheepishly at Hinata, who was berating her for falling asleep in class.

"… Naruto, you have no excuse for sleeping! You were only there for five minutes! Why are you so disrespectful towards Iruka-sensei?"

She rubbed the back of her head as she was contemplating the wisdom of coaxing (forcibly extracting) Hinata out of her shell – who could have guessed that under that shy, little, seven year old girl would be such a stiffler for the rules?

Naruto grimaced as she half teasingly, half seriously, cut the girl off by announcing out of the blue, "Hinata, I think I liked you better when you were shy."

Hinata raised one blue eyebrow at her friend's exclamation and sniffed, "You know you have no one to blame for that but yourself."

Naruto groaned as she followed Hinata down the street. Honestly, that girl was like a walking conscience.

Naruto and Hinata stumbled upon Shikamaru and Chouji – their other friends – partaking in their favourite (and trademark) pastimes – cloud watching and eating respectively.

"Yo Shika, Chouji!" Came Naruto's congenial greeting.

Shikamaru tilted his head to see them approach, and grinned lazily in greeting. Chouji gave them a wave and a, "Hey Naruto, Hinata!" and went back to their aforementioned activities.

Naruto sighed in amusement at the lack of response – honestly, those two were way too predictable!

Naruto half listened to Hinata's greeting as she sauntered over to drop down on the ground gracelessly next to Shikamaru, stretching her hands up to support her head. She caught Hinata's exasperated shake of the head as she followed and made a point of elegantly sitting herself down.

It was a comfortable silence; after all they had been friends since the first year at the academy and knew each other very well. Naruto grinned contentedly as she settled down and allowed herself to relax.

They spent the afternoon lazing around, taking full advantage of the gentle wind and bright blue sky.

* * *

Iruka was sitting at a desk with the very last student taking the genin exam standing confidently in front of him, grinning.

Iruka himself was thanking Kami for letting this day go off without too much mishaps; after all, only one explosive tag went off accidentally and no one was maimed (permanently) so that counted as successful! (note the slightly hysterical undertone)

At least, compared to previous (and no doubt future) years.

The table, once full of hitai-ite with the leaf symbol, now only had one left. He glanced up and smiled at the prospective kunoichi and said, "Ok, Naruto. This is the last thing you will be required to complete. I need you to demonstrate the three E-Ranked Academy jutsu; henge, bushin and kawarimi.

She nodded and performed the aforementioned jutsu seamlessly with minimal problems.

He gave a nod, "Well, done Naruto. You have passed the exam. Collect your hitai-ite and make sure you are back here for orientation in two days, 10 o'clock sharp.

Naruto grinned foxily as she grabbed the headband from the table, nodding to show she understood. For a moment she was unsure where she wanted to tie it, but shrugged and wrapped it over the bandages taping off her pants on the right leg. That way, it was out of the way and wouldn't inhibit her eyesight if it happened to slip down during a battle.

Adjustments finished, she turned around and left the classroom, idly wondering if Iruka would ever know just how _damn hard_ it was for her to do the bushin no jutsu. Oh well, at least she passed.

She grinned at the worrying Hinata and flashed a victory sign coupled with the trademark foxy grin to say she had passed, and Hinata let out a relieved sigh.

Naruto felt happy that she cared, but was it normal for a friend to not believe you capable of passing such a ridiculously easy exam? She didn't know if she should feel insulted or happy. Meh, happy is easier, she decided, and then bounced over to take her seat next to the Hyuuga heir as Iruka-sensei said some speech and dismissed them.

Everyone got up, and Naruto leaned over to grab the back of Shikamaru's shirt as she reminded her three friends excitedly, "Hey, you guys promised we could have Celebratory Ramen! You didn't think you were getting out of that one, did you?"

She pouted when Shikamaru muttered _"Troublesome woman"_ under his breath, but quickly smiled upon seeing Chouji's enthusiasm.

They made their way together to the door, but upon exiting they saw a few Hyuuga branch members that were obviously there to collect Hinata.

Hinata looked disappointed at not getting to celebrate, but she accepted the fact that given a choice, the branch members would not be there. No, they were in fact being forced to do this by her father – meaning they had to come back with her, or not at all.

She resisted a scowl at the sometimes barbaric practises of the Hyuuga as she nodded a good-bye to Shikamaru and Chouji, and gazed meaningfully at Naruto. Naruto's brows were creased as she reluctantly nodded – she understood the practises of the Hyuuga.

… Not that Hinata had ever actually told her. You can imagine the shock of poor little Hinata when Naruto turned up at school a few days after they first met and started ranting about the stupidity of it; as it were, her exact phrasing was along the lines of 'big meanies bossing around their own family.' (Yes, Naruto had broken into the Hyuuga compound as well.)

Well, that got a reaction out of the younger Hinata.

She had agreed immediately, and this had led to a conversation about how to stop it – where Hinata told Naruto that her dream was to make everyone a 'big happy family' and stop the slavery of her cousins. Naruto, in a moment of inspiration, proclaimed that she would help Hinata to get rid of the curse seal. The problem there was that the Hyuuga jealously guarded their secrets, so Naruto could not help from the inside.

It had taken a many few minutes of thinking to figure out how Naruto could help. Eventually, Naruto had snapped her fingers and exclaimed, 'I know!' and then proceeded to say that she could learn about those 'seal thingys' and find out a way to remove them once Hinata got the clan to agree.

Long story short, Naruto still studied seals (with all the extra time she has, it had become a favourite hobby because they were just so damn useful) but with how complex it all was, it would probably take years for her to be able to remove the mark, not counting how long it will take to actually figure out how to do so properly.

Getting back to the present, Hinata sedately walked over to the Hyuuga and offered them a smile to which they responded likewise. Ironically enough, the Hyuuga Council did not see Hinata as a worthy heir (which was why she had been forced to become a ninja of the village instead of her house in the first place) but the Branch members loved her.

Naruto shook her head and turned back to the boys and smiled mischievously, "Last one there has to pay for everyone's first bowl!" and sprinted off to Ichiraku's.

* * *

Two days later saw all the graduates gathering once again in Iruka's Domain™ and awaiting the team assignments. Naruto was chatting animatedly with Hinata and Chouji, as Shikamaru was asleep, when the door crashed open and Ino proceeded to argue loudly with Sakura over their 'Sasuke-kun'.

Naruto was laughing loudly, clutching her stomach at the childish antics.

She watched as the Uchiha sat there 'stoically' and avoided the whole situation by apparently convincing himself it wasn't happening; or he really was that much of a bastard and simply didn't give a damn.

Even Hinata's pursed lips twitched when Kiba jumped up from the floor, where he was knocked sometime during the fangirl's argument, and started yelling at Sasuke for being a teme while simultaneously asking what the hell the girls saw in a guy who obviously had a stick shoved so far up his arse that it was messing with his brain.

Hinata and Naruto both agreed wholeheartedly with this statement, but neither wanted to associate themselves with (shudder) fangirls, and they also knew that Sakura and Ino were not rational on anything involving _that_ particular subject matter – it was better to run for cover and count the casualties once the was battle concluded. Self-preservation came first, although they whispered a prayer for Kiba.

The whole class watched on; unable to look away as the hostilities increased when Sasuke called Kiba a "dobe" and Kiba jumped up on the desk to have a glaring match.

It was one of those morbid scenes – like when you _know_ that it is heading towards disaster, but you find it impossible to turn your head. Naruto thought it would be really funny if Kiba fell…

And no sooner had she made this observation than something happened to wack Kiba off balance… and he fell… and ended up KISSING SASUKE!!

The class was deathly silent for a few moments as the boys jumped away from each other and loudly attempted to clean out their mouths – the horror and disgust clear on both their faces – and then the Fangirls Struck.

But Naruto didn't get to see the part where they punched up Kiba because she was rolling around on the ground in silent laughter, holding her ribs in an attempt to stop them from cracking.

It was into this madness that Iruka stepped, and he was very tempted to turn right around and walk back outta there.

As it were, he was well aware that the Hokage AND the prospective Jounin-sensei were watching this, and he couldn't help but give the ceiling a smug look – after all, he wouldn't have to deal with this particular bunch again, even if they did not pass the Jounin's special 'test' (more like specialised brand of torture), as they would be placed under a different academy teacher for the next time promotions to genin came around – if they even _wanted_ to try again.

Anko had had a reputation of mentally scarring the poor gaki (for life) until the Hokage decided that she just wasn't cut out to be a jounin instructor. To this day, if you were to casually mention the phrase "Anko-sensei" in public areas, you were almost guaranteed to cause at least one fully-grown adult to shriek, faint and/or run away screaming. Amusing stuff to be sure, but not to the ones who had been deeply emotionally scarred… moving on.

Iruka quickly broke up the fight and herded the stragglers into their seats before he started on the traditional speech (which was solely for the benefit of the jounin voyeurs he was sure; since none of the kids were listening) and called out the team assignments.

* * *

"… Team 7: Uzumaki Naruto…"

Naruto was, at this point, still breaking into bouts of spontaneous laughter when her ears caught her name leaving Iruka's mouth. She forcibly restrained the giggles and schooled her expression so that she could hear who else was in her team. She just hoped it was one of her friends.

"… Inuzuka Kiba…" Naruto supposed she could survive if she was with the dog-boy; after all, there were worse people to be a team mate with – like the Uchiha-teme. She didn't hear Kiba objecting either. They didn't know each other well – even though they had similar interests.

…But that was to be expected. After all, Naruto had flown under the radar at the academy (by forcing herself to sleep whenever she got the urge to create some chaos, and the chaos that she _was_ responsible for could in no way be linked back to her) so while Kiba had been loud and openly proclaiming what he liked to do, performing rather amateur pranks and such, she had been sleeping and generally unaware of the environment.

The day she heard that his idol was the mysterious prankster; she had been forced to laugh out loud.

But, back to the present, Iruka-sensei said something that had caused all thought-processes to immediately stop.

"… and Uchiha Sasuke."

One corner of her mind registered Kiba spluttering, angry beyond words, as she slowly stood up.

Naruto was not aware of the fact that all the prospective genin close to her were steadily inching away, eyes wide in fear as she glared fiercely at Iruka-sensei, unaware that she was bathing the class in an abnormally high proportion of killing intent.

Hard sapphire eyes glinted ferociously as she said in a tone that belied her expression, "Iruka-sensei, you didn't just say I was on a team with the emotionally-retarded Uchiha-teme."

It wasn't a question.

Iruka, the poor victim of circumstance, proceeded to heap the blame onto someone else, "Umm, Naruto I… it is the Hokage that ultimately decides the teams, I'm afraid. You are in that team." Iruka couldn't help the tremor that entered his voice at that last sentence.

Naruto glared at Iruka for a few moments more to be secure in the truth of this sentence. Although she could tell that what he had said was true, she had a fair guess that Iruka was the one to put the teams together and present them to the Hokage in the first place.

She growled and removed her gaze from Iruka (whose relief was palpable) and redirected it to the ceiling, towards the direction in which she had felt she was being watched. She was always aware of when someone was watching her, and it had been an invaluable resource to avoid being caught 'in the act' of committing a prank… or sneaking somewhere she shouldn't.

Now, she had an inkling that the Hokage was watching the proceedings, so she gave the 'we are going to have words' glare and with a huff dropped back into her seat.

In the Hokage's office, the jounin were treated to the amusing sight of their Sandaime sweating bullets. Oh, and one Hatake Kakashi sporting a large sweatdrop as he looked at his female team member. He just _had_ to get the crazy ones, didn't he?

While Kakashi was feeling extremely put-upon, Iruka's class was still silent.

…Even though Kiba was making a feeble attempt to regain his voice to protest, and that the fangirls probably should have been shouting about the unfairness of Naruto being put with their 'Sasuke-kun'. As it was, it seemed that no one could quite get over that dose of killing intent.

Iruka coughed once most traces of killing intent had receded; although there was still a general air of 'pissed-off' around Naruto to warn off anyone from becoming overly loud, and continued on with the teams. "Team 8 is Hyuuga Hinata, Aburame Shino and Haruno Sakura."

Hinata's brows creased as she noted that it was unusual to have two girls and only one boy on a team; not disregarding the fact that the girl was Sakura. Sakura hung her head, appearing depressed, and obviously because she was not paired with the object of her obsession. Shino didn't change.

Iruka, however, had continued talking, "and Team 10 is Yamanaka Ino, Nara Shikamaru and Akimichi Chouji. I truly hope you all do your best as genin and perform to the benefit of Konoha. You will meet your jounin-sensei in an hour – I suggest that you take this time to have something to eat and get to know your teammates better." Iruka offered them a kind smile before he left the room, leaving them to their own devices.

Naruto was still grumbling obscenities under her breath that were probably not fit to be uttered around her peers when she saw someone approach in her peripheral vision.

It was Kiba, her 'tolerable' (at that moment) teammate.

He offered her a grin that was all fang as he said, "So, you're Naruto? Well, at least you aren't a fangirl – I think I might actually enjoy having you on my team. I'm Kiba, and this here is Akamaru." He pointed out the rather obvious small dog that yipped at her in reply.

She blinked at him and deadpanned, "Just 'might enjoy' you say?"

He got a shocked look and instinctively raised his hands in self-defence, getting ready to try to negate his previous statement - the instinctive male reaction to foot-in-mouth syndrome that results in accidentally ticking off a female - when her expression cracked and her sapphire eyes glinted in mirth as she waved a hand dismissively, "Heh, just messing with ya dog-boy. You really should learn to relax!"

Kiba blinked; completely shocked that she wasn't going to scream at him or something for the comment.

Naruto waited for him to get over it, but when he stayed in the same stupor she waved a hand in front of his face. When he didn't respond, she looked at Hinata, who closest to her at that moment, and whined, "Hiiinnataaaa I think I broke him. Fix him, would you?"

She hadn't noticed that Shino and Sakura had walked up to Hinata, obviously with the aim of team bonding, or that Chouji and Shikamaru were watching on with amusement as well. As it was, she had garnered a fairly large crowd.

Hinata rolled her white eyes and turned to her teammates saying, "Sorry, Naruto, but I don't know how to 'fix' the people that _you_ toy with."

Naruto pouted after Hinata as she left with her team, and turned to the next person she could appeal to. She turned those bright blue eyes at one of her best friends and offered him her best puppy-dog-eyes and said, "Shika, you're a boy. Fix him."

Shikamaru was currently snickering at the scene before him. Kiba was still frozen as his brain refused to process the anomaly that was Naruto – the most surprising kunoichi in Konoha – and Akamaru was whining pitifully. He noted that their third teammate, Sasuke, had chosen to ignore his teammates to eat by himself. Naruto waved her hand in front of Kiba's face again, but it had as much effect as the last time. None-what-so-ever, that is.

Shikamaru rolled his eyes under his friend's pout and said, "Observe" after which he leaned over and rapped Kiba on the top of the head. (Akamaru was currently pulling on the Inuzuka's sandals.)

Kiba shook his head and grinned sheepishly at his audience before Naruto grabbed his arm and pulled him out for some 'bonding'. Shikamaru couldn't help but think that team 7 would be getting into a disproportionate amount of troublesome situations.

* * *

The hour was up and most of the Jounin-sensei had already collected their teams. There were still a few genin awaiting their teachers, and those included teams 7 and 8. The boys were silently waiting impatiently, Sakura was getting a last fix of Sasuke before her sensei came, and Naruto and Hinata were playing a card game.

Naruto was winning. Again. Hinata was put-off by how she _never_ won any game that involved luck against Naruto. Seriously. When Naruto was put in a Bingo Book – for Naruto was _sure_ to be put in a few of those on the way to her dream position – Hokage – Hinata would put money on the fact that the section that detailed 'Other talents' would include 'luckiest person alive'.

Naruto was just that lucky.

It was scary.

Hinata was alternating between focusing on how badly she was losing and the fact that Naruto had her feet crossed and propped up on the desk. She gave Naruto a pointed look, which her friend ignored in favour of proclaiming "Go Fish".

Hinata just sighed.

It was in this moment that a woman with long black hair and red eyes walked through the door. Upon inspection of the clock, it was precisely the time that was designated for jounin instructors to pick up the genin. She gave the room a smile and said, "Team 8, my name is Yuuhi Kurenai. Please follow me."

Hinata dropped the cards and silently stood up to confidently follow her sensei from the room, Shino close behind her and Sakura reluctantly trailing behind them.

Naruto muttered darkly, "And then there were three…" for the benefit of her teammates, to which Kiba snorted in agreement. They had struck up a camaraderie over a hastily eaten lunch; Naruto had always been interested in the ninja hounds that the Inuzuka bred, and she had used this to get the conversation flowing.

It _had_ helped that they were also in accord concerning the 'Sasuke Issue' (as they had taken to calling it) – they both disliked him and decided that if he _must_ be on their team, they would at least _attempt_ to remove the pole stuck in his brain.

And if that meant they had to insult and provoke him all day long, heaven help them, they would persevere for the good of ninja-kind everywhere!

…At least that was the Official Explanation.

Speaking of 'official', Naruto _had_ gone to the Hokage during lunch break for that 'chat' and was forced to grudgingly admit that while she actually agreed with the reasoning behind the teams, she didn't have to like it. At all.

Sandaime had cut right to the chase when Naruto had barged into his office (via the window).

Apparently, _her_ team was meant to be a combat-ready team, made for missions that would most likely confront opposing forces. That meant she, Kiba and Sasuke had to be able to survive direct attacks. She agreed that all three of them would be able to hold their own on the battlefield; Sarutobi knew she had a high chakra level (making her an ideal ninjutsu type), while Kiba and his family taijustu and specialised techniques would be invaluable, as would the teme's undeniable flair for battle.

Of course, discovering that there _was_, in fact, a reason behind the placements (instead of the previously assumed randomly-pick-them-out-of-a-hat method); she was interested to know what was with Hinata's team. Sarutobi had said that they were designed for reconnaissance missions – the Hyuuga's Byakugan and the Aburame's bugs would be perfectly suited for that.

Of course, that had gotten Naruto curious about just why the heck _Sakura_ was on the team. She had grinned at the Hokage's sheepish expression as he admitted bluntly, "Well, Sakura wasn't specialised, and comes from a civilian family. It was the original intention of putting her with Sasuke because she was the official kunoichi of the year, but due to her obvious lack in combat abilities we considered it stupid to put her in a team where direct confrontations were practically guaranteed –that would mean almost certain death for one who could not effectively defend themself. Originally, Kiba was going to be placed on Team 8 due to his family techniques, but those could also be of use on a heavy combat team. The deciding factor of switching Kiba and Sakura was that Team 8's sensei, Yuuhi Kurenai, is a genjutsu specialist, and as such is the most capable of developing Sakura's talent."

Naruto had been so shocked at the thought that _Sakura_ - Sasuke's #1 fangirl - may have actually been on _her_ team that she was having trouble processing the information. She had tried to order her thoughts by summarising, "So basically you had no idea where to put her and as such put her on a team where she would be able to develop her skills with minimal threat of combat situations."

Sarutobi had grinned and nodded in accord. Naruto had nodded absently and turned around to leave, but Sarutobi had added, "Oh, and if you were wondering about team 10… it's tradition."

Naruto had rolled her eyes and exited through the window.

Which left her at the academy without her card partner (victim) and bored out of her mind. She lazily collected the cards and spent some time shuffling and re-shuffling them, but that got boring after the first twenty minutes. In the corner of her eye, she could see Kiba twitching from staying still for so long, and the Uchiha in the same broody position he had been perfecting since childhood.

Finally, she stopped shuffling the cards and placed them back into the pouch on her hip (although it was technically for weapons) and crossed her arms across her chest.

Waiting…

…still waiting.

… it had been a grand total of thirty-seven minutes and twelve seconds and Naruto was about to go crazy with boredom. She decided to think about something… anything.

'… five, six, seven, eight… ok, Kiba has nine kunai hidden in his jacket, twelve in each pouch and one on each sandal.'

…It was safe to say that Naruto was bored to tears. Naruto briefly entertained the idea of doing something that would get them talking (like pulling out the spare futon from the seal on the back pocket of her pants) when she decided to use the time to check that her seals were ok.

Now, Naruto had been studying seals for years, and was no where _near_ the rank of 'Master' (or good enough to understand much about those seals placed on humans). She _had_, however, picked up a fair few handy techniques, and she had used them to make her life a hell of a lot easier.

For example, that small futon had been sealed into her back pocket for when the apartment-manager kicked her out (for it happened at least five days per month) – so that she had something other than tree branches to sleep on in the forest.

Actually, the act of sealing things into clothes was something she adapted herself; you see, it is actually quite a tricky thing to do. The seal design had to be _perfectly_ stitched into the fabric (and it was hard enough to be perfect using a brush and ink on unmovable paper - compare that to learning how to stitch properly in the first place _and_ making it so that the stitching was _perfect_ and there is a noticeable increase in level of difficulty) and then you had to make sure that the stitching was strengthened by infusing an _exact_ amount of chakra so that it wouldn't wear down easily or come loose.

Using this theory, she had stitched a few seal complexes with a large storage capacity into her kunai pouches which she used to store weapons (and the odd deck of cards, even a book that she used in conjunction with another seal of her own design) thus increasing (by a _large_ number) the amount of weapons she carried, and lessening the amount of weight she walked around with.

And it just looked like she had wanted a pretty-patterned pouch instead of a standard issue one – something a lot of people overlook, as there is only a small fraction of seal masters left.

There were more of the large storage seals in the inside pockets of her vest, and those held other things (like spare clothes, scrolls, ect). One of the problems was the time that it took to actually make the seals (it had taken her a month or two for each one) but she was willing to persevere for the benefits.

Actually, the only big down-fall she had discovered with the clothes-seals were that they couldn't store food or anything perishable – they even rejected scrolls that had food sealed into them. To circumvent this, she always had a small, tightly-wound scroll in one of her pouches that contained her food.

After all, once she had discovered the uses of seals, she had practically cleaned out her apartment – it had been a wonderful change. You see, in her earlier youth, the villagers would always find a way into her apartment to generally wreak havoc and mess with her stuff, so she was very happy to discover that she had a way to protect her meagre possessions and preserve all that money that had to go towards restocking food.

But now she was finished checking the stability of the seals, and there was nothing to do.

Well, the time on the clock indicated they had been waiting an hour. One whole freaking hour. When you are young, five minutes seems like forever.

The scraping of a chair being shoved back caught Naruto's attention (anything would have at that point) and she watched curiously as Kiba got up and walked over to the blackboard. She could easily see how pissed he was that their negligent jounin had chosen to disregard the pick-up time.

Naruto looked on as Kiba first grabbed the chalk and made a few lines in different colours, then picked up the dirtiest eraser he could find and used it to wipe up the lines. What he got was an extremely dirty multicoloured eraser that he carefully jammed into the door.

Naruto thought it was rather optimistic of him to think that such an obvious trap would work, but experience had taught her that even highly skilled jounin hadn't developed the type of sense necessary for 'prank evasion'.

It was quite interesting to watch this in action, actually – you set up live kunai and they just step out of the way, but have a bucket of paint rigged to fall over the spot that they would go to and they were pink for the rest of the day. Hilarious.

So Naruto stayed quiet and gave Kiba a thumbs-up, inwardly promising herself that she would concoct something far more permanently-damaging and self-satisfying as revenge after she knew her target.

Sasuke, however, seemed to feel the need to say condescendingly, "Dobe, as if our sensei would fall for such a trap. He is a jounin for a _reason_."

Kiba scowled at Sasuke and gave him the one fingered salute, but otherwise deigned not to acknowledge the comment, instead sitting himself into a chair with a full and unobstructed view of the doorway.

At this point, Naruto was fed up with waiting. She stretched out a bit more so she was comfortable, legs still up on the desk, and said, "wake me up before it happens" to the others, before closing her eyes and slipping into the blissful unawareness that is sleep.

* * *

It had been a drum total of two hours, fifty-three minutes, (roughly) seventeen seconds and twelve angry 'hns' from the teme and their bastard of a sensei had yet to make an appearance.

Kiba's eye was twitching as he glared jealously at the sleeping form of his female teammate. _She_ was peacefully sleeping while _he_ (and to a lesser extent the bastard, but Kiba wasn't sure if Sasuke classified as 'human' let alone deserving of his sympathy) had to sit through the whole wait, agonisingly aware of every separate 'tick' of the clock.

_He_ had attempted to sleep at the hour-thirty mark, but had found himself incapable of doing so for multiple reasons – it was light outside, there was a lot of noise, the ever-present (and plainly unnerving) glare of his male teammate… and those were just the first few he came up with!

The more he thought about it, (he had the time, after all) the more he was envious of Naruto's ability to just drop asleep like that – how the hell could she do it? Akamaru had ran home after just ten minutes of waiting, so he had nothing to do at all.

He had entertained the idea of goading the teme into a spar, but decided that Iruka-sensei would be upset when he saw the destruction afterwards. Well, 'upset' would have been one word for it. A more accurate description would probably be 'out-for-their-blood'.

Kiba had wisely decided to stay silent.

Ten minutes later found Kiba rubbing his temple. A whole freaking three hours. Kiba had been reconsidering the eraser trap for the past hour, and had just decided to modify it to include a lot of pointy objects and an unidentifiable stinky substance when his enhanced hearing caught the ghost-like footsteps of someone approaching who was hopefully their jounin instructor.

Kiba was thinking about going to wake up Naruto when he saw her twitch and open her eyes. Kiba's forehead creased in thought – there was no way she could have possibly heard that; it was, in his experience, too soft for regular ears – but as he saw her tilt her head expectantly towards the door and stretch to work out some muscle cramps he was almost convinced that she _had_ heard it.

Any curiosity over this was forgotten as a long-fingered hand curled around the door, immediately followed by white gravity-defying hair and face with ¾ of the skin covered by black spandex and a forehead protector.

The three prospective genin watched in morbid curiously as the eraser fell straight on top of his head; the dust momentarily obscuring the jounin's face. When they got a good look at him, his hair was multicoloured and frankly hilarious-looking.

Kiba burst into (slightly hysterical) laughter and Naruto chuckled at the sight while a tick appeared on Sasuke's forehead – it was embarrassingly easy to read the thought 'is this really a jounin?' as he turned the infamous Uchiha Glare™ up a notch and directed it at the tardy jounin.

The cycloptic jounin seemed to be glaring at them, but it was easy to see that they didn't give a whit.

The jounin was clearing his throat when he was interrupted when an amused voice exclaimed, "_Three_ whole hours? Sheesh, I think that's just plain sad." Naruto had glanced at the clock and upon seeing the time was shaking her head bemusedly.

Kiba and Sasuke spared her a glare before all three turned toward their tardy jounin-sensei as he cleared his throat. They saw the maniacal gleam in his eyes as he said, "Hmm. How can I put this? My first impression of this group… I don't like you."

That menacing tick under Kiba's eye started acting up again as they sweatdropped.

The Jounin told them to meet him on the roof before employing shunshin to disappear in a 'poof' of smoke.

Naruto grinned – she would have fun messing with this man (who so obviously had something to hide) before she practically _skipped_ out of the room and up the stairs to get to the roof. She didn't feel the boy's glares as they sulkily followed, pissed that they had to wait the whole three hours only to get a _cycloptic_ freak who didn't like them.

* * *

A/N: Review... you know you want to. XD


	3. The 'Naruto Effect'

Before I say anything, thankyou to everyone who has reviewed/alerted/favourited/C2-ed this, cos the response has been awesome for this to only be out for 2 days. In light of this, I decided to post this chapter earlier than I was gonna, but don't expect all posts to be this fast, cos that would be impossible. :)

A/N: Well, it has come to my attention that a few people wondered about the pairings of my story. I am aware that I have not mentioned them, and there are legitimate reasons:

1/ It is my belief that if an author focuses on pairings, it usually detracts form the story, so I want to avoid this.

2/ I am also of the belief that the pairings in a story do not make or break the story; it's what an author can make sound believable, and how well they write.

3/ I want it to be a surprise. Not to mention that the pairing probably won't come up for a long time. Seriously, 11/12 yrs old, even for a ninja is waaay to young to be thinking about that kinda thing, in my opinion (or at least seriously) so it won't happen until at least after a time skip period or whatever. Though there may be hints for the attentive reader.

One thing I _will_ say about the pairing, however, is that there is no way in hell it will be Sasu/Naru. Cos that is just illogical (in my opinion) and I refuse to write it. My views on Sasuke and his possible relationships align with what Naruto thinks in this fanfic, which will be expressed in this chapter, actually.

Sorry to people that may not like this, if so be my guest to stop reading. I actually don't mind reading the well written ones of the sasu/naru pairing, but it's just my personal opinion that it could never happen, so if I tried it would sound stupid.

Well, enjoy. :)

Oh, I took a (very ameteur) go at drawing how I picture the female Naruto, and you can find it - pluto-was-a-planet./art/Female-Naruto-98651329

* * *

**Chapter 3: Naruto Effect**

A few minutes later and they were all seated on the roof of the academy.

Their as yet unnamed jounin-sensei had been leaning against the railing when they had gotten there, and none of them were remotely bothered by the fact that there was a very large fall should he happen to lose his balance.

Naruto, while smiling and taking this in with good humour, was actually thinking of rather… _creative_ ways to get back at him for making her and Kiba (and to a lesser extent the teme) wait three whole hours for him to show up.

Sasuke had seated himself a bit closer to the jounin, and Kiba and Naruto exchanged a covert eye-roll behind his back when he reassumed his 'broody cool guy' position. Their attention was redirected, however, when their sensei spoke.

"Alright, why don't you introduce yourselves? One at a time."

They waited for him to point out who had to go first, but it seemed he was waiting for something.

…and still waiting. Kiba's brow creased as he realised the jounin was waiting for someone to ask him something, and he glanced at his 'good' teammate to see that she was looking at him expectantly… damn he'd have to ask the obvious question. He inwardly sighed – he just _had_ to get a jounin with a flair for dramatics, didn't he?

Kiba reluctantly asked, "Well, what are we supposed to say?"

He knew this was the right thing to ask when it prompted an answer from the jounin. A lazy voice seemed to ponder, "Hmm… the things you like… the things you hate… dreams for the future… hobbies… Things like that."

When the jounin didn't continue Kiba silently informed Naruto with his eyes that she would have to prompt the jounin this time. Naruto scowled and asked flatly, "What about you? It's only fair that you tell us about yourself if we have to tell you about ourselves."

This seemed to have been the right 'prompt' as the jounin gave them what could have been a smile and drawled, "Me? I'm Hatake Kakashi. Things I like and things I hate… I don't really feel like telling you that. My dreams for the future… never really thought about it. As for my hobbies… I have lots of hobbies."

Kiba scowled as that pesky tick under his eye made itself known again.

Kakashi-sensei gave them some weird eye smile and pointed at Kiba, "Ok dog-boy, why don't you start?"

Kiba growled at the insult and crossed his arms in irritation, then said reluctantly, "I'm Inuzuka Kiba. I like Akamaru, my ninken, and training with him. I dislike people who don't like dogs or who think they're better than everyone else" - at this he shot a pointed glare at the back of the Uchiha's head. – "My hobby is walking Akamaru and practising the Inuzuka family techniques. My dream is to reach the rank of Hunter-nin."

Kakashi nodded in acknowledgement, thinking something along the lines of Kiba actually being pretty normal as far as shinobi went. He then pointed to the blonde-haired girl who sat to the right of Sasuke and said, "Ok, you next, shorty."

Naruto blinked. She then put a finger to her lips and said thoughtfully, "You know what? I've never heard that one before."

Kakashi blinked in surprise, and he could see the awkwardness/confusion of the boys. Hmm it seemed like he would have to make a study of the weird kunoichi. After all, kunoichi, as a rule, were usually rather quick to anger, and Kakashi had thought that the insult would have been more than enough to provoke her.

Naruto shook her head and offered them a foxy grin, "Well, I'm Uzumaki Naruto! I like ramen and my friends. I dislike ignorant people who judge others without getting to know them first, and the three minutes you have to wait after you pour the water in the ramen cup so you can eat it. My hobby is… ah… practising my stealth skills and hanging out with my friends, as well as studying seals. And my future dream is to be the greatest Hokage ever! That way I will be able to prove that certain… ignorant beliefs were totally false and that I am capable of being a great ninja, and worthy of respect."

Kakashi's visible eye momentarily widened in surprise – _again_ – (he must be out of practise at maintaining his poker face or something) as she said that she aspired to be Hokage. 'Hmm. She grew up in weird way.'

He pointed to the third, "Last one."

"My name is Uchiha Sasuke. I hate a lot of things, and I don't particularly like anything. What I have is not a dream because I will make it a reality. I am going to restore my clan and destroy a certain someone."

Kiba was sweatdropping at the icy and monotone voice the Uchiha was using, and Kakashi was giving no outward sign that he was internally concluding 'Just as I thought.'

The silence was tense, until it was broken by the female of the team snorting, and then bursting into laughter.

The guys all sweatdropped as her condition deteriorated quickly to the point she was clutching her stomach, rolling around on the ground. "St-stop please… too much… laughing. … it hurts… mercy…"

This continued for a few moments before Kakashi dared to ask the question, "Ano, Naru-chan? What's so funny?"

Naruto abruptly stopped rolling around but stayed on the floor. She craned her head to look up at Kakashi from her position on the floor and gave him a grin, "Oh, nothing much. I just got my theory proven, though."

Kiba bit this time, "And that theory would be…?"

Naruto's grin grew as her eyes twinkled in suppressed mirth, "Oh, nothing big… just that the teme is emotionally retarded."

Either Kiba, Kakashi and Naruto didn't notice the scowl and large pulsating pressure point on Sasuke's temple or they simply didn't care. It was hard to tell, but either way the conversation continued when Kiba spluttered out, "and that means?"

"Well, it is my theory that the teme over there forcibly repressed all emotions except this fanatical desire to murder 'that person', and thus has impeded his emotional development – this technically classifies him as 'emotionally retarded', because his emotions aren't developed properly."

Naruto's voice lowered conspiratorially which forced Kiba and Kakashi (who were both getting a kick out of the blonde's 'diagnosis') to lean forward as she continued, "you know, I always knew there was a reason he didn't react to all those girls going after him – and also the reason he looks so girly! I mean, sure, it's only _rational_ for him to dislike fangirls, but to reject all those advances! Either he's retarded or gay… actually, you know, now that I think about it he may actually be gay, because any normal guy would have just chosen one of them, right?"

It was at this point Sasuke's fist impacted with the kunoichi's head. Luckily, she was already on the ground so didn't have anywhere to go… although the loud _crack_ of her head against the pavement was a bad sign.

"Itai!" She whined, rubbing her head, pouting.

Kiba was almost cackling in delight. _Finally_ a girl with commonsense!

Their jounin-sensei was rubbing his spandex-covered chin while gazing speculatively at Sasuke.

The Uchiha still looked moments from spitting fire. He glared at the other two before focusing back to Naruto, who was still rubbing her head, and saying in an icy tone, "Take that back, Usuratonkachi. Or else."

Kiba had stopped laughing at the menacing tone of the Uchiha's voice, but Naruto raised an eyebrow, "Make me. Besides, just because you can't accept the truth doesn't mean I should be nice and lie just to satisfy your ego. I'll tell you what. When you get a girlfriend, I'll take it back. Before then… hmm. I shall call you Uke."

Sasuke had a huge pressure point on his temple and was directing a decent amount of killing intent at Naruto, but the girl didn't react to it. She raised an eyebrow in a challenge. Sasuke actually growled and reached for his kunai pouch. At this point, Kakashi decided to step in and he grabbed the Uchiha's arm, "Maa maa Sasuke, Naruto, no need to fight."

Sasuke continued to glare, but Naruto just stuck her tongue out at him. Kiba seemed to be restraining his laughter at the nickname Naruto had dedicated to Sasuke – and she had actually lived through it! This team may be more fun than he had originally thought.

It took more than a few minutes for Kakashi to diffuse the situation and get all the genin's minds back to what he had originally thought would be the short and simple meeting before he could shunshin away to get back to his precious. It had already been too long as it was!

The jounin shot them one last stern look as Sasuke still looked as if he still wanted to murder their kunoichi, before he said, "You have your first mission tomorrow."

Kiba was curious and a little put-off by the abrupt subject change, so he asked, "What kind of mission are we going to have?"

Kakashi gave them an eye smile, "It's a task that the four of us will do together… a survival exercise."

When Kakashi was not forthcoming with further information, Kiba sighed and asked, "Survival exercise? Why not mission? We already did that stuff at the academy."

The jounin's eye got an excited and suspiciously sadistic glint as he said, "This is not like your previous training."

They were silent, and Naruto and Kiba exchanged glances again, silently debating who would ask the obvious question. It seemed their jounin sensei had regressed to his former love of dramatics and needed to be prompted so that he would give out further information. Naruto sighed, "What kinda training is it then, sensei?"

He was chuckling evilly, his arms crossed across his chest and not looking at them - probably to make it look more impressive - but only managed to miss the exasperated expressions of two of his genin. Sasuke, being just in front of them, had not seen their arguments and thus was buying the silly jounin's act, so he bit out, "What's so funny?" And yes, he was also still angry at Naruto's comments.

"Well, if I tell you the answer, you're not going to like it." Kakashi said teasingly. He had lifted his gaze when he said that, but was clearly too caught up in his obviously well rehearsed speech that he did not notice that 2/3rds of the team were forcibly restraining laughter. The next thing he said did manage to surprise all of them, however.

Kakashi's voice turned hard as he said, "Of the 27 graduates who passed the academy exam only nine will actually be accepted as genin. The other eighteen will be weeded out and sent back to the academy. In other words, this is a make-it-or-break-it, pass/fail test, and the chance that you'll fail is at _least_ 66."

They were all wide-eyed.

Kakashi couldn't pass up his chance to say smugly, "See? Didn't I tell you that you wouldn't like it?" His voice returned to serious mode as he said, "That's how it is. I decide whether you pass or fail. Be at the designated training ground at five am and bring your ninja gear."

Naruto sighed and pouted. _Five_ am? Kami, she would be lucky to wake up before ten! Kiba wore a look of obvious distaste, while Sasuke settled back into his favourite expression and scowled up at their jounin-sensei.

Kakashi gave them an eye-smile again. He _knew_ that there was a reason he took time out of his day to test the gaki every year; torturing them was just so much fun! Outwardly, his voice was light as he said, "That's it, you're dismissed. Oh. Tomorrow you better skip breakfast or else… you'll puke." With that last sentiment, he used shunshin to get the hell out of there. ('Icha Icha, here I come!')

Kiba blanched at the thought of not eating breakfast, and Sasuke's glare may have intensified, but it was hard to tell.

As for the kunoichi of the team; she had a rebellious expression on her face and started angrily, "Like _hell_ I'm going to skip breakfast just because that lazy-arse tells me to! He'll probably be late tomorrow as well, and we'll have to get up early – it's _cold_ in the morning, and I don't know about you guys, but I've had more than my fair share of being freezing cold outside in the morning and I won't submit myself to that! Bastard-sensei can wait three hours for me, and see if he likes it!"

The boys blinked at the kunoichi's rant, and were both looking thoughtful. Kiba grinned, "I think you're on to something there, shorty."

Naruto pouted. Both of them had stood up and the height difference was very pronounced; she was only up to Kiba's chin, and Sasuke was taller than Kiba! 'Shorty' didn't actually bother her though; it was more of an affectionate nickname than anything else, and a far-cry from the usual 'demon'. It was actually true in any case, so she had no reason to complain.

Sasuke seemed to be thinking about it, and his stick was obviously warring with the tempting few hours extra of sleep and something to eat. He tried to rationalise, "Hn. If we are doing a 'survival exercise', then we should eat to conserve our energy."

Naruto hummed in agreement, and Kiba nodded – they _really_ didn't want to get up at five and skip breakfast.

Naruto frowned for a moment, then sighed, "Well, I guess we should make a pact."

The boys looked at her confusedly.

Naruto rolled her eyes, "As annoying as it is, we were all put on a team together. Oji-san said our team was meant to be a combat team, so if we pass Kakashi's 'test', there is a high chance we will have to fight for our lives. All I'm saying is we should form an agreement to ensure we all get through it alive." Her voice was serious, which was very out-of-character for her, and the contrast caught the boy's attention as she glanced at them, shifting her eyes from one to the other, questioning.

They were sober in response to her attitude, and nodded in accord.

Kiba asked the kunoichi, "What should it be?"

Naruto's brows creased thoughtfully, and then she smirked, "Work together to accomplish our missions, and if there is no chance of winning, give em' hell and go out with a bang." Naruto looked to them for their answers.

Sasuke raised an eyebrow at the decidedly morbid statement, but contemplated it thoughtfully. Why not? If they were a good team, they would help him get stronger accomplish his ambition. He also couldn't do all the work by saving their lives all the time.

Sasuke nodded in agreement, his resolve strengthening along with an accompanying smirk. He may actually like this team, he decided. After all, if they turned out to be strong - nothing on him, of course; but strong enough - they could help him get stronger by being sparring partners.

Naruto nodded, and then flicked her eyes to Kiba. He formed a beatific grin that was all fang and raised an arm into the air, "Yatta! We'll be the most kick-arse team ever!"

Naruto grinned foxily in reply, and then turned toward the railing. Looking over her shoulder she said, "I'll see you guys tomorrow at nine. He made us wait three hours, so he gets his back with interest." She winked then added, "Tomorrow, I say we start on that pact and kick whatever sensei's stupid test is to hell. After all, we're Team 7, and it's all in or nothing!"

Sasuke and Kiba smirked at the girl's back, and then turned separate ways to go home.

* * *

If anything can be said about Naruto, it is that she has that rare gift of charisma required for all truly brilliant leaders – the gift of being able to rally the most confrontational people to fight alongside her tooth-and-nail. That day, she had un-wittingly set the foundations of an excellent team.

* * *

It was nine in the morning, and three prospective genin had just entered training ground seven.

The blonde haired kunoichi waved at the boys, who nodded in acknowledgment, and after looking around the deserted ground she chuckled. "Kakashi-sensei isn't even here! I KNEW it!"

Kiba flashed her a fanged grin and said, "Good guess, Shorty. I guess you're the brains of this outfit." Akamaru, trailing at Kiba's ankles, yipped in agreement. Surprisingly enough, Sasuke didn't make any comment. Since this was an improvement to the open disparagement yesterday, neither said anything.

Naruto dropped down so she was leaning against a tree and stretched, "Hmm. Well, since he's not here yet, do you guys wanna play cards?" They missed the glint in her eyes that may have warned them against playing, so they agreed.

What proceeded was Naruto beating the boys spectacularly at poker, go-fish, old maid and snap respectively. By the end of their trials, the boys were glaring at a smug Naruto who only flashed them a victory sign and a foxy grin.

It was then that their tardy sensei decided to shunshin into existence, "Yo. Ano, sorry I'm late, but a black cat crossed my path so I had to take the scenic route." He rubbed the back of his head with his eye curving.

It was at this point he noticed the absence of the indignant shouts of 'You're Late!' that usually accompanied him when he left people waiting for any prolonged period of time.

He opened his eye confusedly and was put-off by the fact that the three gaki that had been at each other's throats yesterday were off to the side of the clearing, arguing over a game of go-fish, _ignoring_ him.

He ambled towards them, strangely missing the usual irritation directed at him when he arrived late. "Ohaiyo Gonzaimasu, minna-san!"

They blinked at each other, then looked at him expectantly.

Kakashi coughed when they didn't say anything, and when none of them talked reluctantly said, "Well. Let's get started."

The prospective genin watched suspiciously as he walked over to a stump and put down an alarm clock. "Here we go. It's set for noon." He gave them an eye smile and held up two bells, which they heard ring softly. "You're assignment is very simple. You just have to take these bells from me… That's all there is to it. If you can't get them by noon you go without lunch. You'll be tied to those posts and you'll watch while I eat my lunch in front of you."

At this point he paused, obviously looking for a sign of outrage because they hadn't eaten. He was sorely disappointed when the boys smirked while Naruto put her hands behind her head and explained cheerfully, "Ha! As if we'd do what _you_ told us to – you're the baka who was three hours late yesterday, and four hours late today! You're lucky that we decided to sleep in till nine and have a big breakfast today, or we'd be really angry."

Inwardly, Kakashi grudgingly gave them points for not doing what he said 'just because' and actually thinking and seeing 'underneath the underneath'. But he was also upset that his attempt at torturing them (just a little) had been thwarted. Ah well, he'd just have to make up for it in the practical. Only yesterday he had had to stop the Uchiha from going for the kunoichi's throat! There was no way in hell that they would work together today! Or was there…?

Outwardly, he smiled agreeably and continued with his well-rehearsed and utilized bell-test lecture, "That's nice. Now, I'm sure you noticed that there are three of you, and only two bells, right?" At there nods, he explained, "Well that way, at least one of you will end up tied to a post and ultimately disqualified for failing to complete the mission. That one goes back to the academy. Then again, all three of you could flunk out too. You can use any weapons including shuriken. If you're not prepared to kill me, you will not be able to take the bells."

He took this chance to examine their expressions. Naruto's eyebrows were creased and she had a thoughtful look on her face. Sasuke seemed determined and Kiba seemed to be glancing at his teammates from the corners of his eyes.

Kakashi allowed the bells to ring again, to draw their attention back to him, "When I say start, you may begin."

"Ready? Start" And with that, to Kakashi's immense surprise, the three ran off together.

* * *

Sasuke was twitching. Once he had told the others that he would do it be himself, the Uzumaki had rapped him on the head and said, "Uke, I know you have a huge ego, but use that organ we call a _brain_. He's a _jounin_. We can't possibly match his strength. I know it is hard and all, but give it a go. Need I remind you about the pact yesterday? This isn't just about passing; this is about getting to kick Kakashi-sensei's arse!"

Kiba had snorted at the nickname, but managed to pull himself together, "Shorty's right, teme. Actually, have you _ever_ heard of a two man team? There must be something else to this test we're missing."

Sasuke looked thoughtful but the boy's attention was brought back to Naruto when she snapped her fingers, "I've got it! He must be testing our _teamwork_. Why else put us on a three man team? The bells must be to distract us from seeing 'underneath the underneath' or whatever."

Sasuke looked thoughtful, and reluctantly nodded when that actually sounded like it was within the realm of possibly – that jounin was a bastard after all; it only made sense that he was a sneaky bastard.

Kiba accepted it readily enough; he just wanted to kick the jounin's arse. "So, what do we do about that?"

Naruto smirked; an expression that the boys would learn _always_ meant major problems for the subject of her thoughts.

* * *

"Ninja must know how to conceal their movements and hide effectively." Kakashi said to himself as he stood on training ground seven alone. He was let-down, actually. His gaki had run off together, but quickly split up again – there was not enough time for them to plan anything worthwhile so they had probably been arguing about who was going to get the bells.

He reached into his pouch for Icha Icha Paradise, and started reading. He couldn't believe that he had allowed himself to think that these gaki would be different from the others. "What are you waiting for?"

A bush moved and Kiba leapt out of it. He pointed at the jounin and said loudly, "You think you're so cool, don't you? Ha! You made me wait three hours yesterday, and an hour today, so I guess now it's about time I get to beat you!"

Kakashi looked resignedly at the dog-boy. It would seem as though he had an idiot, after all. "Ok then. Shinobi battle techniques part one: taijutsu."

Kiba scoffed as the jounin made no move to put his book away, "So, are you going to put your book away before I beat you?"

Kakashi didn't even look up from his book as he said dismissively, "Oh, don't worry. With your weak attacks, I'm sure I won't even need both hands."

Kiba gave a battle cry as he ran in, angry.

What resulted was a heavily one sided taijutsu battle.

Kakashi had just gotten behind Kiba when Akamaru jumped up and made a play for the bells. The jounin wisely released Kiba and sidestepped the dog. "Oh Kiba, that won't work. It's also probably not a good idea to let your puppy play with the grown ups; he might get hurt."

Kiba and Akamaru growled, but they caught sight of something behind Kakashi and Kiba gave the jounin a cheeky wave, "Have fun and play nice, sensei!" And then he darted off to the trees at the side of the clearing.

Kakashi was well aware that Sasuke was behind him, as it seemed that the only one on his team who could hide their chakra was Naruto. He turned idly around, putting away his book as an afterthought. When he was looking at the boy with his hands in the tori seal, he was only a little worried; after all, a genin could hardly have the chakra capacity to use an effective katon technique - unless you had the Kyuubi sealed in your gut, of course.

He was unpleasantly surprised when Sasuke performed a sequence of seals and said, "Katon! Gokakyu no Jutsu" before breathing in and releasing a decent sized fireball at his teacher. It wasn't anything compared to what he had seen before, but it was still good considering.

Kakashi jumped to the side out of the way, ending up near the edge of the clearing, "Sasuke, Sasuke, Sasuke. Now what will you do? You haven't got enough chakra left to put up much of a fight." He was caught off-balance when the Uchiha smirked. He heard the sound of a shuriken speeding through the air, and then the sound of wire snapping.

He had to jump backwards away from the activated trap of live kunai that were shot towards him. He thought he was all clear, so he was surprised when the ground collapsed from beneath him and he found himself covered in a watery substance. He looked up at the top of the pit, surprised to see something floating down that seemed to stick to him because of the substance he was swimming in.

That seemed to have been the last of it, and though he was confused as to how that trap was there and how he didn't sense what was going to happen, he shook himself out of the shock and grudgingly pulled himself out of the hole.

_Flash_

Kakashi blinked his eye to get the light out of his eyes so he could see again, and what he saw horrified him. His three gaki were _laughing_ at him; well Sasuke was smirking, Naruto was in hysterics and Kiba was pointing and laughing.

He glared at them, which unfortunately was not as effective with only one eye, but it did nothing to halt these activities. The thing he was sacred of was the fact that Naruto had a camera hanging around her neck, which was the cause of the earlier flash.

He decided to check the damage, and upon looking at himself had to restrain a strangled shout – they, _the devils_, had covered him in _pink_ paint, and those objects floating down from before were _sparkles_. He was pink. And sparkly. and pissed off. A Bad Mix.

"YOU THREE!!" He yelled.

They stopped laughing and looked at him expectantly.

His eye twitched at the lack of apologies. He opened his mouth to shout 'you fail!' gladly when Naruto shook her finger at him.

It was then that he heard the soft tinkling of bells and was dumbfounded to see Kiba and Sasuke holding up a bell each, wearing near identical smirks.

Kakashi was contemplating the benefits of going homicidal on the gaki when the girl held up his precious. He desperately reached into his paint covered pouch, only to find _it_ MIA. He didn't say anything. They didn't say anything.

...

It was then that the pink Kakashi disappeared in a puff of smoke, which naruto recognised as being from a kage bushin. The genin were startled, and searched the clearing. It was around then that their sensei stepped out from the tree line and walked towards them, smiling.

"Good job, everyone. But not good enough, apparently."

Naruto ignored the jounin in favour of waiting for the photo to turn out. 'Please please please please please work!'

Kiba was scowling at the jounin, but seemed to remeber something. He lifted up his hand, and right there was a bell, "Ha! Kakashi-sensei we have the bells." Sasuke showed off the small bell in his hand as well, looking very smug.

Kakashi eye-smiled and formed a seal, saying, "Kai."

The bells turned into stones on pieces of string.

The genin were shocked, to say the least. Naruto was pouting; that was supposed to be her payback!

Kakashi decided to make his judgement, then. He was actually pretty impressed by the plan; had he not switched with a kage bushin at the start of it, there was a possibility he may have fallen for it. He admitted it was a pretty good plan. "You guys... pass."

They all looked confused and Kiba was the first to say, "Wha? But, sensei... we didn't get the bells."

Kakashi nodded his head, "Hai, but that wasn't the purpose of this test. It was teamwork."

Kiba grumbled, "But we just did it to have a shot at getting you back for making us wait!"

Kakashi chuckled, "Well, it still got the same result. Someone once told me that in the ninja world, those who break the rules are trash. That's true. But, those who abandon their friends are worse than trash."

They were all smiling now, but Kakashi was suspicious of the grin that Naruto wore. It was then that Naruo held up the picture for him to see. He was... less than pleased.

It was a picture of his kage bushin covered in pink paint and sparkles, glaring at the camera. It _looked_ like _he_ had been caught by the prank. 'Well crap.' was all he could think. "Was that really necessary, Naruto?"

Naruto's mouth hung open in disbelief, and she retorted quickly, "Of course it was necessary! How else were we going to get back at you for being late yesterday _and_ this morning?! Plus… Now we have blackmail material."

In a second, Kakashi had his back to them; silent tears streaming comically down his face; although they couldn't see it. She just _had_ to get a picture of his bushin like that, didn't she?

Kakashi was scowling in distaste as Naruto tapped the picture pointedly, "fine. We meet here at nine. I am going to assess your strengths and weaknesses so I can figure out how to train you effectively. In the afternoon we will complete our first mission."

The jounin didn't smile in a nice way as he used shunshin to get the hell away from his first team. He was planning on getting them back by giving them a crash course in ANBU styled training; or as they liked to call it, hell.

He was cackling madly in his head.

He would have to get them weights so he could add to them whenever the gaki annoyed him, and all this torture would make up for them pranking him! They would _rue the day_ they managed to get 'black mail' material on their sensei! Usually, he would have left them to develop their own talents, but he really felt like being sadistic.

They would learn to never cross Hatake Kakashi ever again.

Oh, this was going to be so much fun!

* * *

But they didn't know that right then.

Naruto and Kiba high-fived while Sasuke walked away; after all, the fangirls would find him if he stayed in one spot for too long.

Kiba followed after Sasuke to challenge him to a spar or something, and Naruto just shook her head and sealed the picture of Kakashi away for safe-keeping; she had quite the collection of funny memorabilia, as after every prank she would get photographs of the outcome, which were always great for a laugh when she was feeling down.

She pondered for a moment what she could do, and then she decided to find Hinata and ask her how her test went. She had no doubt Hinata had passed; after all, Hinata was good at that kinda stuff. No, she mostly wanted to relate what they had done to Kakashi-sensei.

Now, _usually_ when she pulled a prank, she had no one to boast to; Naruto prescribed to the school of thought that said if you didn't talk about it, there was a much better chance of a secret _staying_ secret, so she was happy to finally get a chance to boast about _something_.

* * *

Naruto may have looked like she was oblivious to all the glares as she walked down the street in Konoha, but she was anything but. It didn't matter though; she had long ago learnt to disregard the stares of the many for the few people that were genuinely her friends.

And there were two of them now!

They seemed to be following a jounin who was smoking (and did so a lot, if his scent was anything to go by) and with that Ino girl who had been put on their team. Naruto could hear her screeching at them for something or another from down the street.

All three of them, who had been distracted, noticed that the noise level in the whole street seemed to have dropped. Ino and the jounin were obviously a little unnerved, but Shikamaru and Chouji scanned the street – it wasn't hard to find her, as she was given a decent amount of leeway on the otherwise crowded street.

She walked towards them and smiled brilliantly, "Yo guys! How did you do?"

Shikamaru smirked having caught on that she was questioning about the extra test, "just fine. I was wondering how the hell you managed to get those two working together, but I think that's something no one will ever understand."

Chouji grinned and nodded, knowing what Shikamaru was talking about. Naruto pouted then whined, "I didn't mean to this time, I swear! I don't _think_ I did anything…"

Shikamaru just shook his head in mock exasperation – although it may have _actually_ been exasperation – at the kunoichi. "So you managed it, then."

It wasn't phrased as a question, because he already knew. She nodded, smirking mischievously.

Now, the jounin was interested in this exchange, and not only because it was the most energetic he had seen the Nara all day. He was also confused by it. He caught the genin's attention, as he _had_ been able to ascertain that by some miracle Kakashi's team had passed, and raised an eyebrow in question.

Naruto donned an innocent expression and started examining the sky while Shikamaru smirked at his jounin and explained lazily, "I call it the 'Naruto Effect'. When she meets people that are kind of crazy, she affects them in weird ways. It seems to work that the crazier, the more extreme the change."

Asuma sweatdropped. Naruto was trying to protest, "Lie! Nothing happened!"

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow, and Naruto pouted and crossed her arms then said shortly, "Fine. I called the Uchiha 'Uke'. Kiba was using his brain and Sasuke was attempting to kill me at the meeting due to the previously mentioned nickname. Then we made a promise to be a team, and I managed to get a picture of sensei's bushin in pink paint and sparkles; not the _real_ thing, but the picture looks like it's him!"

The cigarette fell out of the jounin's mouth, his eyes widened comically. Chouji almost dropped his chips. Ino was making a chocking sound at the nickname for her 'Sasuke-kun' and Shikamaru smirked, patting her on the head, "There, now. Glad to know you can admit it when you make the impossible happen."

Naruto was pouting and swatted irritably at the boy's hand. She turned to the jounin as he was looking glassy-eyed and said, "I wish I could have seen that."

Naruto's expression transformed as she reached into her pouch and withdrew a picture, showing it to them. "Wish granted. We needed blackmail material. Oh, Kakashi is also going to be on time…"

Asuma was seriously considering getting down on his knees and proclaiming the girl a minor deity for that last one. Instead, he just laughed at the picture.

After the three laughed at it for a while, Naruto reluctantly put it away. "Well guys, I'm sorry but I gotta go find Hinata-chan to tell her about this. Ja ne!"

She turned to leave, but Asuma had an intriguing idea, "Hey Naruto, wait up!" Naruto turned around questioningly, so Asuma continued, "Have you heard of Team Gai? The jounin is Maito Gai; bowl haircut, green spandex, goes around shouting about 'the flames of youth'?"

Naruto shuddered and nodded; yes, she had seen a man matching that unfortunate description running around with some genin.

Asuma smirked, "Well, he is Kakashi's self-proclaimed 'Eternal Rival'. Just saying it could be… interesting to see what Kakashi would do if you were to somehow start some kind of competition between them… plus, I think the 'Naruto Effect' would be handy for some of his genin; he's got a pretty messed up Hyuuga, and a mini-me. Enough said."

Naruto looked thoughtful at this very good piece of information; although she thought her own exposure to spandex was a price she may not be willing to pay.

So she said diplomatically, "Hypothetically speaking, that would only happen if our teams somehow met up, which doesn't sound likely. I'll keep it in mind, though – thanks, Asuma-sensei!" And she ran off down the street.

They blinked as the noise level in the street returned, and Ino seemed to be turning red at suppressed anger. Asuma was still chuckling at the picture of Kakashi as he dismissed his students. Chouji and Shikamaru ambled away, while Ino stalked off.

Naruto, meanwhile, was following Hinata's trail, in the form of scent, which led her to a training ground not too far away from the Hokage monument. Ironically, it was training ground eight. She covered up her chakra signature and climbed up a tree to settle down amongst the branches lazily as she watched from a distance as the female jounin apparently lectured Sakura on something… ah. She was lecturing Sakura on the fact that her acting as a fangirl was a 'stain on the reputations of women who worked hard to gain respect from the male-dominated world of the shinobi.'

Naruto wondered just what else the kunoichi had done or said to Sakura to actually make her _listen_. She looked like she was almost ready to swear off Sasuke, and Naruto was curious to find out just _how_ the jounin had managed that.

After a few more moments, the jounin dismissed Shino and Hinata, telling them to meet her at the same time tomorrow so they could start on missions. She then dragged off Sakura, to who-knows-where.

Naruto silently made her way through the trees, giddy with anticipation. Oh, how she loved doing this! Naruto pumped a precise amount of chakra to her legs so that she was flung out of the tree, landing just in front of Hinata and Shino, facing them.

Naruto was mildly surprised when Shino twitched along with Hinata; usually the bug-boy wasn't unsettled by anything. She grinned, "Tut tut, Hinata! 'A shinobi must always expect the unexpected!' Guess you failed that one, hey?"

Hinata scowled and asked peevishly, "How the hell do you _do_ that?"

Naruto's eyes widened in mock shock, "Hinata-chan _swore_. Shino, did you just hear Hinata _swear_? Because I could have sworn that she just swore. That happens… _never_!" Naruto appealed to the silently twitching boy, mostly for the fun of it –she had actually got one over Shino!

"Yes Naruto, Hinata said 'hell'. I believe that that expression can be applied to these circumstances, and thus this response was only logical. I do, however, agree with Hinata's question." Shino said in the monotone voice of his. Shino wasn't actually a bad guy; he just didn't have anything to say most of the time (where Naruto enjoyed talking at every opportunity).

Naruto backed away from the glaring Hinata and quite frankly unnerving stare of Shino and said cheekily, "Is that so?"

Hinata smiled sweetly, trying to calm down Naruto and Shino - she had been _really_ surprised by the kunoichi's entrance. "Yes, Naruto, I swore. Now would you please answer the question?"

Naruto grinned cheekily once again as they started walking back into Konoha, "No."

Hinata and Shino waited for the infuriating kunoichi to expand on her answer, but none was forthcoming.

Naruto changed the subject, possibly sensing the discontent in her current companions, "So you guys passed, eh? My team also passed, as did team ten."

Hinata blinked. "But your team… you do realise that this was a test of _teamwork_, don't you? Or did your jounin test something else?"

Naruto shook her head pleasantly, "No, your first assumption was correct. It was a test of teamwork, a sneaky one, at that."

Hinata blinked, obviously finding it hard to believe that Kiba and Sasuke had gotten along, especially with Naruto in the mix… oh, wait a minute. Hinata shook her head and muttered, "Naruto Effect."

That was all she said, yet it was the only possible explanation.

Shino, being the listening type, knew about the supposed 'Naruto Effect', but wasn't certain as to how it worked. Well, nobody was, but the Aburame usually tried to find logical conclusions, and logic seemed to play no part in almost anything that the kunoichi did.

Hinata rubbed her eyes, "Any casualties?"

Naruto donned that too-innocent look, but it collapsed into a mischievous smirk as the kunoichi reached once again into her pouch and pulled out what was fast becoming her favourite possession.

She explained as she showed them the picture, "Well, one Uchiha who I now call 'Uke' as well as one very pretty pink and sparkly bushin. Oh. And apparently Kiba has a brain. Who'd a thunk it?" Naruto wasn't being mean towards the dog-boy really; it was just that _usually_ he was just running around being loud and thinking he was invincible.

Hinata raised her eyebrow at the apparent picture of a tall jounin glaring at the camera dazedly, and then smacked Naruto on the head, making a grab for the photo (which was quickly replaced securely into the former's pouch-seal).

Hinata was seeing red, "NARUTO! YOU SHOULD NOT DISRESPECT YOUR JOUNIN-SENSEI LIKE THAT!"

Naruto 'eeeped' and danced away from her shocked and outraged friend.

'Conscience indeed' she thought sourly as she ducked another swipe from Hinata. "Hinata, you really need to loosen up!"

Hinata spluttered and redoubled her efforts at hitting Naruto, who had decided to run away while she was still relatively unharmed and come back once Hinata had calmed down.

She yelled, "Ja, Hinata!" when there was a fair distance between them, and quickly took to the shinobi highway to get the hell outta there.

* * *

A/N: For those who don't know, 'Uke' refers to the more submissive partner in a homosexual relationship – so basically Naruto is calling Sasuke gay and girly with one little statement. Gotta love Japanese, ne? 'Usuratonkachi' means something along the lines of useless or weak.

Also, I know in this chapter it seemed there was a bit of Sasuke-bashing; I want to clarify that I am not doing this with that intention; it's just that he really is that much of a prick at this stage of the story (if you don't believe me, watch back over the first few anime episodes) so he needs his ego to be taken down a few (hundred) notches.

Hmm one more thing, if I stuff up on the Japanese phrases ect, its cos I have never studied japanese at all, and I only know what I do from reading Naruto fanfics/watching the anime with english subs. In light of this, I'm bound to screw up big a lot, and if people pick up the screw ups, please tell me. Cos it would suck if I just left them in there.

Well, thanks for reading.


	4. Newton's Third Law

A/N: Yo guys! Thanks to all the peoples who reviewed ect, I hope you enjoy this. Sorry for leaving it, I put my muse down and forgot where, so it took me a while to find it again.

Disclaimer: I am a disclaimer, thus I am intended to distract the reader while skyflyte attempts to check if the original writer of Naruto has all of a sudden decided hand it all over to her. Wait a second… hmm no, it seems as if Naruto has not changed hands in the time it took to say this. Strange, no?

NOTE: For those who read the previous chapter when it came out, I switched out the part where Naruto pranked Kakashi to her just getting his bushin due to the argument that she shouldn't be able to do that - those who this applies to will understand, those that don't do not need to worry about this.

* * *

**Chapter 4: Newton's Third Law**

To every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.

"I'm telling you, we have to go _this_ way." The genin pointed down the street, indicating the direction to which she was referring.

Her teammate scoffed, "Oh, sure, if we want to take ages to get this done. Maybe you _are_ an idiot after all. Anyway, I'm the _leader,_ meaning I know best and you have to follow _my_ directions. And I say we go that way." The finger pointed in the opposite direction as he looked down on his female teammate with an air of superiority.

This statement was responded with a growl from his female teammate and she moved forward threateningly, "Why you stupid mutt, as if you have enough IQ to properly decide what you should put on in the morning let alone attempt to be our leader! Why I oughta…" The blonde advanced threateningly on her brown haired teammate, who took an involuntary step backwards.

The impending brawl was interrupted by the input of their third teammate who was scowling at both of them before focusing on his male teammate, "Dobe, as if you're the leader. I would have to agree with the usuratonkachi in saying that you do not have the mental capacity to be a leader. _I_ am Rookie of the Year – if anyone is this team's leader, it's _me_." The raven haired boy sneered at his teammate and snatched the package out of the boy's hand.

The blond snapped her head to her other male teammate, her irritation mounting, "You are such an arse, Uke! Who cares who the leader is if we can't even complete this stupid D-Rank mission?! I have to say, you two are _both_ idiots!" Naruto growled again, glaring at both of the taller boys who seemed to flinch involuntarily under her hard gaze. She held it for a few more moments before turning around and storming off in the direction to which she had originally indicated, forcing the boys to follow her.

Tensions were running high for team seven, and it had a lot to do with their jounin-sensei.

It had been a month since their bell-test.

A very, very long month.

And it had all started with their first training session, during which they had discovered that Kakashi could be a sadistic slave driver the likes of which they had not yet encounted in their short lives.

...Even while he was reading that stupid perverted book.

_~~~~~One month previously… ~~~~~_

* * *

Three genin entered training ground seven at nine o'clock.

They were greeted by their scarecrow jounin.

And they suddenly feared for their lives.

* * *

Naruto was feeling very bad 'sadism' waves just rolling off their sensei, and she could tell that the others felt it too (although the Uke was such a bastard that he tried to hide it) and she was actually going to suggest the standard 'run and hide' method of evasion when the jounin put away that disgusting orange book and turned to them.

Naruto silently 'eeped' at the pure sadistic pleasure that was thinly veiled on the jounin's ¼ of face that they could actually see.

"Well… damn." She muttered under her breath.

She had a feeling that the jounin was planning on getting back at them for yesterday's prank. Even so, the words 'I regret nothing' came to mind, and she grinned, reminiscing of the beautiful prank that had gotten her into a lot of trouble.

"Err… yo, Kakashi-sensei." Naruto said weakly in greeting.

The boys said nothing; Naruto had had ample experience with hate, so she handled it better than them. Kiba looked like he thought that running was still an option, and the Uke was stiff as a statue, probably acting under the naïve illusion of if he didn't move, Kakashi would pass over him.

The jounin, who was currently stalking towards them, said jovially, "Ohaiyo Gonzaimasu Naruto, Sasuke, Kiba. So glad you could be here on time."

Kakashi was dissecting them with his eyes, planning out exactly how to cause them the most pain possible with the constraints he was under; he sadly wasn't able to maim and/or kill them – that was unfortunately rule #1 in the jounin-sensei handbook issued by the Hokage.

And they had said that Sarutobi was being silly when he added that rule. Hm. Well, Kakashi now knew that it was impossible to see the utter necessity of that rule until you have been a sensei.

Too bad it wasn't overlooked.

Abandoning those thoughts, he smiled at them, and it wasn't a nice smile.

"Well, we should get started, shouldn't we?"

* * *

Three bodies were sprawled out on the grass of training ground seven, three hours after their arrival. The three dishevelled genin were desperately panting for breath after their first hand experience of a Gai-approved training session inflicted upon them by their evil cycloptic jounin.

Needless to say, Kakashi was very pleased that his ability to torture through training had not been lost when he left the ANBU. He felt like rubbing his hands together and cackling evilly.

As it were, he had actually learnt a few new curses from his female genin, which quite surprised him in both their creativity and deviousness. And he thought he'd heard em all.

A blond head of hair lolled to the side, and he caught blue eyes glaring at him.

Ah, he loved his job.

* * *

When they arrived Kakashi had gestured to them, and they reluctantly followed him into the middle of the training ground.

He had reached into a pack that was sitting innocently in the middle of the field, and pulled out what looked like normal bands of light armour, quite non-descript in a hidden village, but the delight their sensei was displaying while holding them up for inspection indicated that things were not as they seemed.

He had eye-smiled and silently handed them over to the genin, who put them on confusedly. They were light, and did not restrict movement.

Naruto had looked confused as he handed her a practically neon orange pair. This was Kakashi's idea of self preservation; he was a little unsettled that she had managed to steal the bells from his bushin, so he was taking no chances.

After all, next time, she might go for his Icha Icha.

And absolutely no chances were to be taken with his precious – he had been surprised to see that the female of the team had managed to sneak up on his kage bushin, even if it was only capable of a fraction of his abilities.

So this was a rather thinly veiled attempt to make it _impossible_ for her to sneak up on him – he thought that those things could glow in the dark!

…which may just prove a problem on the higher-ranked missions… hmm. He'd have to get her something to cover them up for those. But oh well. Now his precious should be safe. If she could get the drop on him in that garish orange, then he wasn't fit to call himself a ninja.

Once they all had their respective sets on Kakashi had quickly performed a set of seals and tapped all of the pieces, activating them. They couldn't feel anything different yet, so they looked at him confusedly, "What are you doing, sensei?"

Kakashi pleasantly answered, "Oh, don't worry. They should start working about –"

"Eeek!" Naruto yelped as she plummeted to the ground – Sasuke and Kiba grunted at the weight, but were able to stay upright.

"– Now. They are weights, and they adjust according to what your body can handle as well as your chakra capacity. They will help you to increase speed and strength. Oh, I can also make them heavier by applying chakra, as well." Kakashi eye-smiled in delight, although he was curious as to why Naruto's weights seemed to be so much heavier than Sasuke and Kiba's.

While Kiba and Sasuke were cursing at their predicament and Naruto was pushing herself doggedly off the ground, Kakashi quickly took a peek at Naruto's chakra capacity with the Sharingan.

To say that he was surprised at what he saw was a massive understatement.

The girl had the largest chakra stores he had ever seen on any genin; any _kunoichi_ for that matter, as well. And it wasn't the fox's chakra; it was her own. Her stores must have been _at least_ what he himself had.

This girl had a seemingly limitless potential, and no one had recognised it! His brows creased when he noticed a faint, almost non-existent, shimmer of chakra in the air around her – it _looked_ like elemental chakra, but he had never seen anything quite like it before. He wondered what it did, and if it had anything to do with the Kyuubi.

He had rationalised that if it was something bad, somebody would have noticed it before – right? He decided to store that piece information away for re-examining at a later date, and had returned back to his three nervous students.

Well, at least he knew now why her weights were so heavy.

He toyed with the idea of lightening them to a more bearable weight, but had decided against it. After all, _she_ was the one who had set up the traps yesterday. Meh. He'd do it after he got to laugh at her for a while.

"Ok! Let's get started! 40 laps around this clearing. Hop to it." Kakashi had made a shooing gesture with his hands at them, after which he pulled back out his orange book.

And so the torture had begun.

While Kakashi was delighting in his sadistic pleasure and porn, Naruto was trying to adjust to the weights. With sheer determination, she forced herself to keep running. It pissed her off that she was so far behind the boys. In fact, she was having trouble just lifting her feet. No way in hell was she going to give up and have them laugh at her!

She could almost _feel_ what was probably her muscles tearing and somehow knitting back together but she refrained from complaining about it. She needed to get stronger, and hell, if Kakashi-sensei - no matter how much sadistic pleasure he was deriving from this - was actually willing to teach her; she would work as hard as she could.

She was just awesome like that.

She grinned momentarily as she started catching up to the boys – it was getting easier. She _could_ do it, so she _would_ do it. Kiba was swearing under his breath – at her for pranking Kakashi-sensei yesterday, and at their sensei for giving them weights.

They finally finished, and had waited for Kakashi as he closed his book and walked towards them.

What she didn't know was that Kakashi was surprised that it had taken her such a short time to adjust to her heavy weights; he'd thought she would have collapsed after that first lap, and he wouldn't have been surprised by this outcome either.

"Ok. Now the warm up is complete, we can start."

Those groans were almost as good as Icha Icha to him.

And so the torture had continued.

* * *

We meet up with the motley trio after, where Kakashi was considering poking the two boys to check that they were still alive.

As he observed them silently, he was thinking about the work that they would have to do. He would set Kiba to working with his clan on his family taijutsu, which he could then improve by getting him to spar against his teammates to become more proficient in it. That would help all of them.

Kiba, he knew, was a kind of prodigy for his family techniques – the best so far in his generation. He also knew that Kiba didn't really have the amount of chakra required to do some of the more demanding ones, which he corrected by resorting to food pills.

He would have to put a stop to that, as using those food pills would actually work against Kiba in the future. With prolonged use, the pills actually weaken the body's chakra coils and effectively make it impossible for the person to increase their chakra capacity. And that wouldn't do at all. Kakashi had also noticed that Kiba fought more fiercely as time went on; drawing on anger to keep him going. That was all well and good in a friendly spar, but it also caused the boy to become sloppier, making it much easier to hit him. That would also have to change.

His eyes trailed over to Sasuke, and he knew that he would have to teach the Uchiha himself. After all, he knew the Uchiha's style from both using his Sharingan and having an Uchiha as a teammate. He would also have to find a way to knock out that dangerous Avenger attitude; it wouldn't do for Sasuke to get jealous of either of his teammates when they improve, as it was bound to happen. That attitude could be dangerous.

It was the last member of his team that he didn't exactly know what to do with. Naruto was going to be difficult to teach in respects to taijutsu. Her deficiency in this area was glaringly obvious, but also was the suspicion that it wasn't really her fault; she had the forms and stances of a bad street fighter. For this, Kakashi blamed the instructors at the academy – taijutsu could very rarely be self-taught, because it required someone to make sure the stances were correct, and not everyone was suitable to a single style of taijutsu.

As such, Naruto was years behind in this area, and Kakashi was simply unable to teach the basics; he also didn't know which style of taijutsu would suit her best. Wait a second…

A very crazy idea was working itself into his head just then, and he had to exert an effort not to start cackling evilly on the spot at the prospect of it.

It _was_ perfectly logical, although even he was wondering if what he was considering was going too far.

… And then he remembered that photo of 'him' in pink paint and sparkles, and almost instantly the prospect of this idea sat much easier on his conscience.

The logic was simple. Who was the best taijutsu master he knew? Why, he answered himself, that would be Maito Gai. He _could_ sacrifice a short talk with the man to submit Naruto to the Green Beast's non-existent mercies and inhuman training sessions; and she may even learn taijutsu out of it! Plus, it would mean she would have to get up at five every morning. Oh, this idea was brilliant!

But he would have to stay silent until he found the time (and courage) to approach Gai. That in itself almost deterred him from the plan. But no. He would persevere. The ends justified the means, and he was fairly sure that Gai would know which style of taijutsu would suit his student best – he was a genius in that particular area, after all. All Kakashi would have to do was think of a trade to get Naruto into those sessions.

He pulled himself out of those thoughts, and attempted to get their attention.

He chose to do this in the easiest possible way. Also the way that would bring him satisfaction.

He flipped through a short series of hand seals, and water from the pond was suddenly dumped on his three exhausted genin. That got them up fast.

Kiba jumped up and pointed yelling, "You bastard! Why the hell did you do that!"

Sasuke was on his feet and scowling at him, and Kakashi had the urge to laugh as the Avenger looked weird with his hair flat and clothes dirty.

Naruto stalked up and _growled_ at him, which to his surprise he found mildly threatening. She grinned evilly, and Kakashi noticed idly that she had longer canine teeth than was strictly normal. It helped with the over all threatening attitude, but sadly, her wet and bedraggled appearance detracted from this, as did the hair that was stuck down by the water. "Just for that, I wonder what the ANBU will think of your new look?"

Kakashi scowled, and made a resolution to talk to Gai before lunch. He did _not_ want to encounter the jounin after he found out about his 'eternal rival' being 'bested' by a genin. He would probably be the laughing stock of the ANBU.

He covered up this reaction and pointedly ignored the threat, and gave them an eye-smile when they continued to scowl/glare at him. "Ok team. Well, it's been a good start. Obviously, we have areas that each of you have to work on, and not everyone specialises in the same area – which is really the point of a team; that all three are able to combine abilities to get a much better result, one's weaknesses being covered by another's strength. Go have a healthy lunch, and I expect you to be at the bridge in an hour for our first mission."

And with that, he 'poofed' away.

Naruto crossed her arms and glared at the spot that was just vacated, "I hate him."

Kiba nodded, "Me two."

The third member added his voice, "Hn."

They turned to the black haired boy, surprised that he would deign to enter the conversation. Sasuke turned around and walked off, probably to change and eat.

Naruto scratched the back of her head, "Did he just grunt?"

Kiba scowled, "Che, I think you were right about that whole 'emotionally suppressed' thing."

Naruto looked at the boy incredulously, "You just discover this now?"

Kiba shook his head quickly in answer, gesturing to Akamaru, "Well, see ya later, Naruto."

Naruto sighed and picked at her wet clothes, "Mmm. Healthy lunch. That stinks."

And they both walked off, with a bath and food in mind.

* * *

Kakashi appeared at a large training ground and saw the green spandex that indicated he had found the jounin that he was looking for.

Now wasn't that strange? Usually, he was running away from Gai. Ah, well.

Kakashi pulled out his book and walked casually over to where Neji and the mini Gai were sparring. The Hyuuga was brutally beating down the genin in spandex, while talking about fate.

The original Green Beast had spotted Kakashi the second he arrived, and while Kakashi could see that Gai's mouth was moving, he had long since learnt how to block that voice out. The genin had stopped training, and he absently noticed that the Hyuuga and the bun-girl were twitching. Oh, he was supposed to be talking to Gai. He put a concerted effort in and heard the end of a sentence "… unyouthful behaviour in front of my students!"

He couldn't resist, "Hm? What did you say, Gai?"

He enjoyed the reaction, if not the volume level. "AHH! MY ETERNAL RIVAL'S HIP ATTITUDE AGAIN!" Yelled Gai, which was made complete by the waves crashing and sun shining in the background.

Kakashi blinked. He had tried figuring out how to become impervious to that genjutsu, but even the Sharingan was unable to stop it. He had tried. Gai was still going on about his cool ways, and Kakashi noticed that mini-Gai had stars in his eyes. He decided that it was probably not a good idea to let Gai continue his rant, as the mini-one looked like he was going to do something, and Kakashi had a feeling it would mentally scar him. "Er, Gai?"

Gai stopped immediately and made a concerted effort to look like he was being serious, which was almost as ridiculous as his rant about the flames of youth. "Yes, Kakashi?"

"Can I speak to you in private?"

Gai went into his 'nice guy pose' (which was ignored by focusing solely on his porn) and turned to the genin, "Ok! I want you to run around Konoha twice!"

Bun-girl groaned when the two boys sped off immediately, apparently in competition, and then set off after them. Gai then turned to Kakashi, managing to look a bit serious. "So, what did you need to speak with me about, Kakashi?"

Kakashi put away his book as a sign that he was serious; when it was just the two that was the agreement, "Well, you've heard I got my first genin team yesterday?"

Gai nodded and seemed ready to go into a rant about how much better his team was, but Kakashi interrupted before it could start, "You also know that Uzumaki Naruto is on my team, then?"

Gai nodded, huge eyebrows creasing. Kakashi continued, "Her taijutsu is horrible. I think it has something to do with the academy, but whatever the case, she has a lot to catch up on."

Gai was frowning, and Kakashi knew he had pieced together his presence. Kakashi was on edge when he saw the light in the man's eyes. Just like when he had decided to take in a genin that was unable to use chakra. Kakashi forced himself to continue, "Since you are the best taijutsu master I know, I was wondering if she could join your training sessions in the morning with Lee? She has an unnaturally high level of stamina, and I believe that she should be able to learn quickly, if only due to her determination. She would probably be a good sparring partner for Lee, actually. It would push him to work harder with a partner that is not always seeking to deter him from his dream. She is actually similar to Lee in regards to determination, I think."

Ah, the hook. That Naruto would be able to keep up with them, as well as suggesting that she would be a challenge for Lee would convince him, hopefully. And that way the female of the team should be able to catch up. It was also a challenge for Gai, that he should be able to get a genin so deficient in the area up to par.

Gai nodded 'decisively', although it looked strange, and said, "Ok! I will take on your genin and she will be a challenge for Lee! Tell her to meet us at training ground nine tomorrow at five! I will test her then."

Kakashi nodded seriously, "Thanks, Gai. Well, Ja ne." and with that, he left via shunshin, glad to get away before his team came back and Gai started being outrageous again.

Privately, Kakashi was happy of the outcome. He only had to endure Gai for a few minutes, he was able to avoid a loud conversation about his bushin's unfortunate colour change yesterday, and he also had a way to continually ensure the blonde paid for her prank. Payback aside, she should also improve on her taijutsu which would ease his mind when they inevitably had to take a higher ranked mission.

But that wouldn't be for a while. In the meantime, he should give them a few jutsu to learn, and start them on chakra control, if only because it would give them something to do while they waited for him.

* * *

_~~~~~ Present Day_ ~~~~~

While the team had started out amiably, the three genin had become extremely volatile with being forced to endure Kakashi's 'boot camp' combined with the mind-numbly dull D-Rank missions. Naruto, being forced to endured Gai One and Gai Two seemed to have gotten the wrong end of the stick and was even more exhausted than her male teammates – and they were all burnt out physically and mentally.

This had lead to small arguments which had snowballed – Kiba's obsession with being 'top dog' was something that none of his teammates appreciated, while Sasuke's attitude was received with the same level of contempt, as was Naruto's tendency of fooling around and being pulled off by chuunin at random moments, which was frustrating the boys both because she was usually pulled out of missions and that they had no idea where they were taking her because their sensei wasn't talking.

To put it bluntly, tempers were running high.

Even so, the three were able to work around all these differences – that pact they had made with such determination was still present, and drove their training to new heights, also managing to ensure that all the petty quarrels were mostly just something they used to distract each other from the frustration they felt at the lack of excitement and adventure so far in their shinobi careers. To put it simply, the fighting stopped when the action started.

Mostly.

* * *

"Team seven reporting in, Hokage-sama. The mission was completed." Drawled Kakashi, who was beside his three disgruntled 'troops'.

Sarutobi Hiruzen hid a smirk by adjusting his large official hat and observed the genin. He had to admit that he had concessions on assigning the cycloptic jounin his very own team, but it seemed that things had turned out well. He could see in their movements that they had improved drastically in a month – all three were moving smoother and with the balanced gait of a trained shinobi, which was a huge transformation compared to the children that had came from the academy – that said a lot about their proficiency in taijutsu.

Even Naruto, who was still as hyperactive as she had always been betrayed her increase of skills at odd moments.

That was intriguing – Naruto was actively changing her movements to disguise her training from other shinobi. What was even more surprising was that it was very difficult to spot, and had Sarutobi not peaked at a few of her 'lessons' with Gai he would not expect a thing.

"So, what should I assign you this time?" The Hokage's eyes shifted to the stack of papers.

He was interrupted, however, by a loud voice protesting, "Oji-san no way are we're gonna do anymore of those stupid D-Rank missions! Give us a harder one, I promise you won't regret it! Our skills are being _wasted _hanging round here!"

Sarutobi studied those steady blue eyes even while Iruka squawked out his objection and explained the importance of the D-Rank missions. His eyes shifted to her teammates Uchiha Sasuke and Inuzuka Kiba, both of which obviously concurred with their feisty teammate. Cutting off the indignant chuunin, Sarutobi addressed their jounin who was chagrined with his student's outburst against the leader of the village's shinobi, "What do you think, Kakashi? Are your genin ready for a higher ranked mission?"

The silver-haired jounin seemed to ponder this for a moment, but Sarutobi could tell he just did this to increase the dramatic effect… and he had a suspicion as Naruto scowled at him that she knew that as well. "Yes, Hokage-sama, I believe that my team is ready for a harder mission."

Kiba and Naruto cheered while Sasuke smirked – he was above cheering, it seemed.

The Sandaime Hokage hid a smirk as he glanced down at the papers, "Hmm, I think I have just the thing…"

* * *

A/N: Yay! I finally wrote another chapter! I hope you guys didn't get too confused by the flashback thing, but I had started to write this chapter a few times and that's what came out of them by combining some of my crazy ideas. Well, next chapter we'll get into the action, and I hope you guys enjoyed that.

Oh, and about Naruto's huge amount of chakra, well in the anime Kakashi says Naruto has more chakra than him when they are attempting to climb trees, so really Kakashi's emission is a massive understatement as this Naruto has been training her chakra from a young age which logically means she would have a lot more.

Last thing, I haven't read through this as much as I have the others, so there will probably be some mistakes - just tell me and i'll fix em up. :)

XD Skyflyte12


	5. First Mission

**Chapter 5: First Mission**

"I hate you, Kakashi-sensei." Team Seven's resident blonde stated flatly.

"Now now, Na-ru-to; you should be more cheerful – after all, it was _you_ that wanted a C-Rank mission, correct?" The tall silver-haired mask-wearing sensei of said team shook a finger at his 'cute student' as he reprimanded her cheerfully.

"I hate you, Kakashi-sensei!" The words were now said in a half-hearted attempt at an up-beat tone.

Kakashi eye-smiled, ruffling his student's spiky hair "Much better."

The blonde growled quietly and ducked away from the hand, skulking over to hide behind Kiba.

"Ero-sensei" Naruto grumbled spitefully at him before flicking a nervous look back at the man… she never could quite tell when he was being serious or not, and the last time that had happened it had gotten her chucked in one of the ANBU Interrogation cells (you know, the ones they made for _interrogating traitors_) writing out _'I will not steal my sensei's porn books any more, under pain of watching my sensei burn down all the Ramen stands in Konoha'. _

Hey, it wasn't her fault!

Naruto only felt that he could do with overcoming his addiction, and thus helped out in the best way she knew how – by taking them (duh!).

Unfortunately, it seemed like the man took it as a personal insult to his 'mad awesome ninja skills' (Naruto's words, not his) that she was able to do so. Really, was it such a bad thing that she had such awesome pick-pocketing skills? Apparently the fact that she could also do it with the bracelets (that had bells on them, that ero-sensei had insisted she wear after successful attempt #7) was just a further insult to his skills. And Naruto felt that he was becoming waay too paranoid whenever she was within reaching distance of him.

Part of the reason he went so far as to involve ANBU was probably _not_ her… 'fascination' of divesting him of porn, however. Because, well…

…_Apparently_ planting 35kg of catnip in Kakashi's house, opening all his windows, and after it had made all the cats in a twenty mile radius to converge on said apartment in all their tetchy demonic fury to complete Mission: Retrieve Tora was 'Not Acceptable'.

Humph, how Kakashi _wilfully_ ignored that they'd broken the record for fastest catching of the Demon Cat in a decade and thus been inducted into the ANBU's Hall of Fame (the picture framing the moment of capture in all its catty, crazy glory) not to mention how she'd gotten a week's worth of Free Ramen from Ibiki… well, she had no idea. And it wasn't like she'd not been forced (at sword point) to clean it all up afterwards (stupid scarecrow).

Honestly, it was a Rule that sometimes, scarifies _just had_ to be made, and if Scarecrow-sensei couldn't swallow that… well, it wasn't _her _fault. What made catnip so irresistible to cats, anyway?

She threw another glance at the ero-sensei before deciding to talk to the dog-boy, "So Kiba, you don't think _you_ could…?"

Dog-boy smirked. "Na-ah-ahh, Naru-chan" the brunette ignored the loud shout of 'Don't call me that or so help me Kami…!' "That's _your_ responsibility. After all, 'the client is always right', right? And our client decided he wanted _you_ to do it."

"But-"

"Shut up, usuratonkachi." The Uchiha deigned to cut in, sporting his default expression of boredom/anger (at least that was what Naruto was coming to understand).

"Shut up teme!"

"Why don't you _both_ shut up?"

"Be quiet dobe"/"Make me dog-boy!"

"Hem-hem." The three genin froze.

Kakashi clearing his throat was a Tell that they had learnt to pick up on quickly. It was never loud, never seemed anything other than natural and was never over-blown, but when it was heard, it translated as "Shut the Hell Up Now. Dear Kami aren't shinobi supposed to be quiet, fools?"

Of course, this was Naruto's own personal variation of the 'oh-shit be professional' scale of Scarecrow Interaction.

The day he'd thrown her in the ANBU cell, he'd actually _coughed._ _Thrice_.

Of course, there was also a difference between the 'Hokage wouldn't mind _that much_ if I lost a genin' to the run-of the mill cough.

Team Seven was proud to say that they were by now expert Kakashi 'Be-Professional' Scale readers… or at least Naruto could boast that.

Kakashi eye-smiled at his frozen deshi and continued on walking, saying cheerfully to the fat-man, "Excuse my genin, Matsuda-san, they are… excitable."

The merchant that had hired them smiled and shook his head "That's fine, Hatake-san, I have interacted with shinobi before, and I have the utmost confidence in Konoha's genin teams."

"Thank-you for the complement" Kakashi said with a smile that stretched his lycra face mask into a weird shape.

The three genin had fallen back from the two adults. Naruto whispered, "Does that kind of…"

"Freak me out? Hell yes! Kaka-sensei's crazy." Kiba furiously whispered back and Akamaru, who was perched on the Inuzuka's head, barked in what the other genin of team seven could only guess was agreement.

Naruto glanced the Uchiha's face and decided that, yes, they were all in accord.

It kind of sucked how sucky their first C-Rank mission was. It wasn't exactly hard for her to forget the briefing.

_

* * *

_

Earlier:

…_The Sandaime Hokage hid a smirk as he glanced down at the papers, "Hmm, I think I have just the thing…"_

Sarutobi pulled a sheet of paper out of the stack of missions and glanced at it before nodding decisively. He cleared his throat, "This is a C-Rank mission. You will escort a merchant to Otafuku Gai – he has requested assistance moving his goods to a better store, as well as your help in delivering messages to his business partners during the time you are there. You have two weeks to complete this task, although it shouldn't take that long. He has a son that you will also be required to protect. I trust you all to act in a way properly befitting of a Leaf-nin and to not bring disgrace upon our village. Remember that you are no longer academy students. Dismissed."

Kakashi didn't look up from his book as he said lazily, "Meet me at the gate in an hour, make sure to pack enough for a prolonged mission." After which he disappeared in a swirl of leaves.

Naruto scowled at the empty space beside her but the scowl slid off her face to be replaced with a smile – they had actually gotten a good mission for once! She could actually, for the _first time_ in her life, leave the village. It didn't matter that it was only for a fortnight tops, or that they would be tasked with moving crap most of the time; they were on a C-Ranked mission!

She sent a wave to the old man before turning around, following the teme out of the room.

* * *

They met up an hour later at the aforementioned spot. Sasuke and Kiba had large packs on their backs, which no doubt included what they would need for the next few weeks. Naruto didn't look any different – after all, she had everything sealed.

Naruto had used the time to find Gai-sensei and inform him of her impending mission, although it involved having to block out the rant about 'youthfulness' and the 'Springtime of Youth' for a disproportionate amount of time, although he became bearable at the end and told her to keep practising her taijutsu.

Her taijutsu training was extremely different from the way the Green spandex-clad man was training Lee. For one thing, he had gotten rid of her weights. Kakashi had been right in giving them to her for the initial part of her training, but Gai had said they weren't suited to her. The initial increase of speed that they had granted her had stuck, but Gai had said that she couldn't afford to be wearing weights all the time – they were counter-productive since she needed her speed and wasn't going to be a taijutsu master in any life in either case.

She needed to be proficient in it – after all, taijutsu was often the last line of defence for ninja; you needed to be able to defend against close-ranged attacks as well as long-ranged – but she was never going to be crazy-good… or at least without giving up ninjutsu and completely focusing on training her body.

The style that Gai was teaching her relied heavily on speed and unpredictable movements, combined with precise hits to pressure points to disable the opponent – which meant she'd had to study scrolls to know _exactly_ where to hit to deal the most damage. Gai had explained that it was a Kaze-style and she was picking it up fairly quickly; the movements seemed to have been _made_ for her – much to her sensei's delight.

A hand landed on her shoulder and she looked up to see the curved eye of her sensei, "Ready, Naru-chan?"

The blonde's eye developed a tick and she growled, inadvertently revealing her unusually long canines, "DON'T call me that! Or so help me kami I'll…"

The hand left her shoulder and the nonplussed jounin handed their papers to the chunin guards, "Team Seven leaving for C-Ranked mission to Otafuku Gai. We were supposed to meet up with Matsuda Kenshin to escort him and his son."

The chunin glanced at it and lazily marked something down on the book that was resting on the table before waving vaguely and saying, "That's your client over there – he's already paid the fee to have his goods sealed for the trip. Good Luck."

Kakashi turned and walked lazily over to the clients, and Kiba was jittering with nervous tension while Sasuke didn't move – Naruto grumbled mentally that he probably felt it was beneath him to go and greet the client properly. She covertly waved to Izumo and received a wink for her troubles before she span around and approached the two.

Kenshin looked fairly nondescript – a little bit er… padded… than the regular man, brown eyes and hair, and a kind smile on his face. The thing that made Naruto want to recoil in terror was the terror attached to him – a bratty six-year-old with black hair and currently screaming something about 'super powers'.

She approached them, and Kakashi was saying "…Team 7 of Konoha. These are my students; Naruto, Kiba and Sasuke." He indicated which he was talking about, and Naruto waved a little – after all, this guy was the client.

He bowed a little and said "We thank-you very much for accepting the mission – it is always good to have better protection along the main trading routes, and I worry that Daichi is going to run off at any moment."

He _did_ seem sincerely grateful, so Naruto decided that he was okay in her book. She inched away from the brat though – no _way_ was she getting roped into caring for him!

Since Matsuda-san was ready to go, they just walked out the gate.

Naruto glanced back at the chunin who was once again slouched over the table again before saying so only her team could hear, "Huh. I'd a thought it would be harder to get out. Are there even any ANBU around here, Kakashi-sensei?"

The silver-haired jounin never even glanced up from his neon-orange book, "You'd think so, wouldn't you?"

Naruto frowned, very aware that it was highly likely her sensei didn't hear a word she was saying and rolled her eyes, "Thanks for the _invaluable_ insight there, _ero_-sensei."

Kakashi didn't miss a beat, "No problem."

Naruto stared but settled for shaking her head and turning back to look at their other companions.

After almost a month of Sasuke suffering his teammates ire because of his less-than-desirable attitude, he hadn't changed a whit. Still stuck up, still assuming that he was/had to be the best at whatever they did because he was an Uchiha – like that was anything to be proud of – and whenever Kiba or Naruto managed to show him up he'd always get this petulant look and growl _'If I had the_ _sharingan_…' insert what he'd be far better than them at.

It was frankly driving the two of them to the edge – they'd been _forced_ to kidnap the teme last week and hang him from the Academy building when he insulted Inuzuka Tsume – Kiba's mum – and she'd been out for retribution. Naruto never knew that the Inuzuka were so vicious when it came to their 'pecking order' but go-figure – they _did_ share a lot of traits with their ninken after all.

* * *

It had been four days since then, and no matter how much she had tried to avoid it, the Brat had 'taken a liking to her' and thus Matsuda Kenshin (the evil, sadistic client) had made it her task to 'keep an eye on him'. What she was thinking before (that he was nice, dammit, _nice_) was obviously completely and totally _wrong_, because only evil people placed their children in the care of poor, suffering kunoichi.

Kiba had been taunting her and laughing himself sick the whole freaking trip, and Sasuke had been silent but in a 'you're getting what you deserve, _dobe_' way, and it _sucked_.

"Naru-chan! I found this really-cool bug and it-and it's-so-awesome and I know you'll-love-it-and-come-look!!"

Her back stiffened and she turned her head ever-so-slowly to the source of that whiny-voice.

_THIS MISSION SUCKS!!!_

(end of chapter)

* * *

**OMAKE #1**

**THE BONE**

* * *

"You know, if the stuff you said about 'all or nothing' and 'we're a team so we watch each other's backs' were true, we'd kind have to help him outta this situation." Kiba pointed out mildly, watching the Uchiha's fangirls fight over him like two rabid dogs over a bone.

Naruto looked back in the direction of their second teammate and shook her head, sighing, "Aaa, my young dog-boy, this is not an area suitable for kicking ass and taking names – all males must learn how to correctly deal with females in their own time. Besides, I bet you know what happens when someone tries to take away a dog's bone."

Kiba cringed. Add a bone, plus a super powered ninken, and you have a missing arm. He wasn't so dense as to ignore the comparison. "Oh."

Naruto smirked, nodding her head. She ruined the moment as she smiled cheerily and said "Not to mention that it's great entertainment for us!"

Kiba made a small nodding gesture while watching Ino and Sakura fighting over the dark haired avenger, "Yes, there is that."

Sasuke scowled at them, barely managing to keep a pout off his face. What happened to teamwork?

_

* * *

_

Yo guys!!

_Hee hee, it's me again. Yes, you're all very proud of me for ACTUALLY WRITING SOMETHING FOR THIS! Or at least I'd hope so, cos i found out that (to my horror) I haven't updated this since December '08 so I figured that it was about time I made another wack at it XD_

_I'm not exactly sure where I was going with this, but we've all gotta start somewhere, right?_

_-skyflyte12_


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